


The Love Trail

by afraidtocare



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Attempt at Humor, Coming of Age, F/F, Fluff, Friendship, Light Angst, Maturing, Mentions of Anxiety, Pining, Self-Discovery, Slow Burn, Soft girls who cant deal with their feelings being in love, mentions of past bullying
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-02
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-03-12 12:56:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13547781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afraidtocare/pseuds/afraidtocare
Summary: That was it. It was over for Jiwoo, just like that. She felt like an arrow had shot her straight through her heart.She was in heaven, powerful and powerless at the same time. This unknown girl had painted Jiwoo’s black and white existence with all the colors available in the world. From what she felt, she could even have done the impossible and managed to create new colors, too. Wow.This feeling surely is new.--Or, a story about friendship, maturing, growing up and, most importantly, finding the strength to become a better version of yourself.





	1. I.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! ~~ 
> 
> First of all, I'm so excited about writing a LOONA fic! All of the girls are wonderful and so talented and complex, they give me so much to think about and to work on for this story! 
> 
> Secondly, I'd like to write a few notes about this fic: 
> 
> 1) I used the korean school system for the story, so the girls are all in the secondary school (high school), which in Korea has only 3 years. Jiwoo, Heejin, Hyunjin, Yerim, Jungeun and Chaewon are all in Grade 1, while Sooyoung, Haseul, Jinsol and Viian are in Grade 2.  
> 2) Throughout the story I'm going to use Sooyoung's name as Yves and Viian's as ViVi, because I find their stage names very very cute >_<  
> 3) The girls from Odd Eye Circle and Chaewon are surely going to be part of the story, but not for now, though! They are going to appear later but I haven't forgotten about them <3  
> 4) Lastly, I'm going to make a good use of exclamation points, sorry not sorry. Mostly on Jiwoo's povs, and I couldn't help it. Have you seen this girl's personality? She's the definition of exclamations!
> 
> Thank you for bearing with me and I really hope you guys enjoy the story! ^^
> 
> You can always find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/JiniusLab)! ♥

**I.**

If there is one thing Jiwoo is completely sure of, is that her meeting with Yves was nothing but pure destiny.

She had always been a true believer of fate, had always supported and respected all the powers and magic the force field surrounding the universe has. It’s her creed.

But after so many years of waiting and waiting but nothing happening to her, she had already accepted that maybe those beautiful and special energies perhaps simply wasn’t meant for _her_. And she had long learned to live with that fact, it was okay. It could be enough just to observe and cherish from other people’s luck, it was fine. Really.

But it seemed like after long 16 years of waiting, her time has finally come!

Meeting Yves turned her world upside down. She gave her life a purpose, something to look for. Destiny chose the most wonderful way of paying her back after all those years of tedious and lack of luck. Everything has a reason and their paths crossing is not a coincidence.

So Jiwoo is more than willing not to let fate’s hard work be taken for granted.

 

♡♡♡

 

“Do you have plans after school, ViVi?”

Jiwoo had been sat alone in a bench at her school campus, just scrolling through her twitter feed, when a random voice caught her attention.

It was her third week at this new school, and things couldn’t be more dull in Jiwoo’s life. Because of her mother’s work, she had moved from Cheongju to Seoul a month ago. Without a choice, she had to leave behind everything she had ever known, pack all her belongings and say goodbye to the place she had lived for all of her 16 years and just move out, all in a blink of an eye.

Changes, novelties and adapting to new places seems exciting in fiction, but once it is actually happening to _you_ , in _real life_ , it’s not easy at all. Having to start all over is not only hard, but it’s exhausting. Not to mention that life and, most importantly, people, hardly ever acts the way you expect them to.

Things hadn’t been the best lately, if Jiwoo was being honest.

But, as weird as it sounds, hearing this random girl speaking brought her to life. Just that sentence was enough to get her attention and to create an exquisite sparkle of _something_ inside of her.

“No.. Not really. I was just about to head home.” A petite, cute, pink haired girl answered. She stuttered a bit, perhaps too shy or ashamed to admit that she had no plans for the evening. Jiwoo could relate.

Then the gorgeous, divine, life changing goddess brunnette opened her mouth again and graced Jiwoo’s ears with her angelic voice for the second time in her life: “You don’t have to be so shy, silly! Let’s do something fun, come on!” And then she took the pink haired girl’s hand and ---- _oh god_. Fuckfuckfuck.

She smiled.

_Shit._

That was it. It was over for Jiwoo, just like that. She felt like an arrow had shot her straight through her heart.

She was in heaven, powerful and powerless at the same time. This unknown girl had painted Jiwoo’s black and white existence with all the colors available in the world. From what she felt, she could even have done the impossible and managed to create new colors, too. Wow. This feeling surely is new.

The girl of her dreams took the cute girl’s hand and guided her somewhere, leaving Jiwoo’s sight. Their encounter was brief but it was okay, destiny works in mysterious ways, after all.

After she left, Jiwoo’s heart was beating so peculiarly fast that she honestly expected this thrill to become a heart attack.

Is this what falling in love feels like?

 

♡♡♡

 

A week passes by and, fortunately, Jiwoo already has more pieces of knowledge about the Mrs Love Of Her Life.

First of all, despite the nickname she grew attached to in the long 5 days without knowing her name, now she has this information: the light of her life is called Ha Sooyoung, but she rather be called by Yves, with a silent “s”. Close friends sometimes call her “Hasu”.

She’s in grade 2, a year ahead of her at school. Jiwoo’s sources also told her that Yves took ViVi, the pink haired girl, under her wing as soon as she arrived from China in the middle of the school year, because of her role as one of the monitors to welcome foreign students at the school. But then they became very close friends.

This all happened last year, unfortunately Jiwoo still haven’t got a clue about her life before that time period. Moreover, to make matters worse, Jiwoo still couldn’t find any of her social media pages, if she has any. But it’s okay, she’s going to find out more about her angel eventually. And last, but not least, Yves is a big, _big_ fan of apples. She always has one at hand during her lunch time and Jiwoo also observed that she has a cute phone case adorned with some little doodles of the fruit. And the best part is that Jiwoo herself is a big fan of green apples! See? Destiny!  

It may seem like it but, deep down, Jiwoo knows she isn’t crazy. She’s just brutally determined once she sets a goal. Not to mention that she’s too organised to be a crazy person.

See, the first thing she did as soon as she arrived home after her first encounter with Yves -- or rather, _The Love Of Her Life,_ like she used to call her at the time when the still didn't know her name -- was craft a plan and strategize what she was able to do in order to get to know the girl better.

After some hours of brainstorm, she finally set a definitive list:

  1. Find out the places she likes to hang out within the school;
  2. Discover who the hell is the sweet pink haired girl;
  3. Get to know who are the other people close to her;
  4. ~~Stalk her~~ Look for a way to know what year she is and which is her classroom;
  5. Find out which clubs she’s a member of (if any);
  6. Find out her name, for Christs sake!;
  7. And, finally, get to know what are her interests in diverse areas, such as her favorite songs, movies, scents, colors, books, etc etc etc!



Any random information would be valuable to Jiwoo, because all she wants is to get closer to this angel and to understand how her soul and mind works.

She may be a drama queen and exaggerate too much on her thoughts and behaviour, Jiwoo is aware of that, but she wasn't kidding when she said that she felt like they have a connection. She truly does believe in that. And as extra and as weird as her list and intentions sounds, at the end of the day, all she wants to do is to get to know this wonderful human being better.

What's wrong with that?

And that was how she started her plan the very next day when her classes were over, after memorizing all she needed to do and realising she needed to actually **take action** , for once in her life.

You see, Jiwoo has the bad habit of dreaming. Quite a lot. Or even... Too much. So much that it becomes a bit unhealthy, if what her mother tells, or rather, scolds, her is right.

She’s used to create a fantasy world inside her head, because that has always been her favorite way of passing time. Numerous books and famous people and fictional characters used to be enough to fill her mind with joy. Imagining what would her idols do if they were at her school, how would they act if they were her friends, all the fun they would have together. Or even creating scenarios where they find true love, to fulfill her own romantic desires.

Just living inside her head used to be enough to make her happy and to make her forget certain things real life didn’t provide her. But now… Now she wants more. So much more. Now she wants the real thing instead of her imagination.

She doesn’t want to idolize Yves from afar, she doesn’t want to just create an image of her inside her head, only to make up what she imagines she would be like. No, not anymore. Jiwoo wants to get closer to her, in real life. She wants to change her ways. She wants something new, just like the feeling she has for Yves is.

Just the fact that Jiwoo is willing to take the first step towards her dream girl is already a sign that she has already started to change, even if just a little bit, by now. Jiwoo is ready to find herself, she’s ready to stop ignoring and placing all of her deepest feelings and wishes in the back of her head. She’s ready to start living in the reality.

Jiwoo is ready to become someone _new._

 

♡♡♡


	2. II.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I lied... I'm actually updating the fic today, a day later lol 
> 
> I'm not good at keeping what I have written to myself, I had to post this next chapter already..
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy it! Now some of the other girls are going to make an appearance and the story is going to be a bit more developed! <3

**II.**

While searching for more informations about TLOHL (The Love Of Her Life, for shorts), Jiwoo realised that just in one day, she had already interacted more with people from her school than in the last 3 weeks.

She unashamedly started a conversation with random people in order to figure out where things were located at the school.

A random girl taught her where the secretary was, a random boy taught her how to reach the sports centre and then she even noticed her school have a pool, who would have known?! Not her, apparently. Even though now that she’s paying attention, she saw a bunch of signs indicating all of these places she neglected before...

Since she still didn’t know what year TLOHL is or the classes she takes, Jiwoo decided to start slow and first get to know the school campus better. She realised that once she was able to tell every inch of the common space inside her school, her life could get easier as she would be able to look for TLOHL faster.

Which was a conclusion she reached using the _trial and error_ method, since when she started her mission the day before, she was lost like a puppy inside the school and couldn’t get any work done.

So now, on the second day of her quest, she is already feeling a bit more at home on the school grounds. But what she didn’t expect, though, was that the campus was actually… Pretty nice?

She usually spent her breaks inside her classroom, reading or playing with her phone, sometimes even sat outside to do the same but she never actually explored her surroundings. There were some nice trees and flowers surrounding some benches at this part of school, and the atmosphere was much brighter and better than the one near the classrooms. Jiwoo took a note of that.

Then she explored the sportive part of the school, the area where all the practice courts and fields were located. And there she luckily found a clue! Jiwoo is apparently a master of strategies, she feels like she’s finally making good use of all the detective and medieval books she has read. She knew her plan was good. Now she’s slowly getting closer to ticking out items of the list.

Inside the running track, there was an athletic girl team practicing with their coach. The four girls were set in line, pretending to run while not leaving the place, and passing a baton to one another. And who are these girls?

As if fate was smiling to her, one of them was the one and only pink haired girl! And for things to get even better, two of the others are no other than two girls from her own class, Heejin and Hyunjin!

Jiwoo didn’t know who the other girl was, but that wasn’t important. She already has a means to get to know two people close to TLOHL’s friend and she couldn’t be happier. She might have even jumped out of excitement. Just a little bit.

Or perhaps she jumped and screamed “Yayyyy!” too loudly, so loud that she caught the attention of a small, round faced girl, who was wearing two super cool buns on her hair:

“I didn’t know relay race got so popular” The girl dryly let out, watching Jiwoo with suspicious eyes. “Who are you and what are you doing here?”

Jiwoo was taken aback.

What is she supposed to tell? _Oh, I’m here looking for a way to get to know one of these girls better, hoping that I can get closer to a friend of hers. Who happens to be the love of my life and I don’t even know her name. I actually don’t really care about this race thing or whatever._

No, she couldn’t tell the truth. But she couldn’t pretend to be interested in this sport, either.

She has no knowledge about any type of athleticism or any sport at all that isn’t 1) ninja running; 2) figure skating; 3) exy -- which is completely fictional. Jiwoo might be a good liar after years of practicing white lies to be able to do what she wants, but this girl isn’t trying to control her or anything, so Jiwoo wants to be as true as possible. That’s the right thing to do.

And that was how she decided to answer with half of the truth: “I actually don’t care about sports, I’m just here exploring the school. I hadn’t come to this part yet and there are so many things happening, it’s exciting!” She then managed to reenact the little jumps she had made before, as if she was still amazed by what she saw.

Though the girl wasn't buying this. She’s a tough one, this little girl. But two can play the game. Jiwoo wasn’t planning on telling, but this girl looked a bit younger than her, not to mention that she wasn’t wearing this school’s uniform.

So after receiving yet another disapproval glance, she used her knowledge on her favor: “Well, I should ask you the same. Aren’t _you_ in the wrong place? At least I’m in my own school, unlike you. So don’t judge me, whatever are your reasons to.”

The girl’s posture didn’t chance, she didn’t portray to be taken aback or even worried about Jiwoo’s words. Kinda like she had already answered this same questions a thousand times.

“You’ve got a point. But I’m always present in their practices, I have a right to be here. And you’re hiding something, I know you are. I’m here to support my sister, Haseul. What about you? Why were you so excited about them?” She sounded too mature for her age and like she wasn’t planning on letting Jiwoo go until she’s got a plausible answer. And she’s keeping an eye on her older sister, huh? Is she afraid Jiwoo might want to sabotage the team somehow?

“Well, I guess we started things the wrong day, don’t you think? First of all, I’m Kim Jiwoo, nice to meet you.” She opened a smile, a genuine one this time, and lifted her hand to the other girl, expecting a handshake.

After a few moments of distrust, the girl gave in and shook her hand. “And my name is Im Yeojin. Now, go on, you owe me an explanation.” She demanded, proving Jiwoo’s suspicions right, that she won’t give in until she gets a proper answer. Well.. Fuck.

“Look, I was telling you the truth, I’m just expl--” Jiwoo started, until she was abruptly interrupted.

“Hey, Yeojin! Did you make a friend? It was about time!”

Jiwoo froze.

And she started to get goosebumps because.. _shit_. She recognizes that voice. She couldn’t stop thinking about it for the last 48 hours.

Then, no other but The Love Of Her Life kept speaking to Yeojin, talking _about_ Jiwoo but still not actually _acknowledging_ her. And honestly? She was relieved about that. She isn’t sure how she would react once TLOHL looks at her, because even now without her attention on her and only standing on the same place, Jiwoo is feeling like she’s having a heart attack. Her heart have not once in all of her life beaten this fast. It feels like it’s going to explode or simply jump out of her chest. Jiwoo is hyperventilating.

“What are you talking about? I do have friends, thank you very much! Besides, I don’t even know who this girl is, I was actually telling her to go away and leave the team alone.”

“Yeojin, don’t be so rude!” TLOHL said, in a scolding voice but laughing nonetheless. “You need to stop being so protective of Haseul and yourself, don’t you think? There’s nothing wrong with being more open to others, not everyone is out there to do you two harm. Besides, what’s so bad about her watching the training, anyway?”

After saying that, she then slowly turned and looked at Jiwoo for the first time. She didn’t say anything, just acknowledged her by nodding her head and sent her a small smile as a greeting.

Now Jiwoo is more than sure that she’s going to throw up her heart and all of her internal organs, there’s no way she’s going to get out of this alive. She’s so gone. Because of that, all she could do as a greeting was to look back at her, trying to disguise her shocked expression. Ugh, she’s hopeless.

“ _...What’s so bad?_ Any outsider can be a distraction! The girls need to focus, and they surely don’t appreciate cute weirdos that jump and scream at them, of that I’m sure!” Yeojin answered, rolling her eyes.

“Jumps? Screams? It seems like things only get exciting when I’m away.” TLOHL laughed in her direction and Jiwoo couldn’t take it anymore.

So she did what any healthy, sane, normal person _wouldn’t_ do and she freaked out and ran away. She was able to shout a hurried “I’m sorry, I gotta go!” before doing that, but she didn’t look at any of the girls in the eye. She just had to get out of there. Her nerves were taking over her and she honestly felt like she was going to faint at any time.

Ugh, so much for her perfectly crafted plan.

Jiwoo is feeling ashamed and pathetic. When she finally had a precious shot of achieving something, of making progress to the goal she was so determined to reach -- which is renewing herself and getting to know TLOHL --, she let her emotions take over her and ran away.

 _Determined my ass_ , Jiwoo thought. _I’m not even able to enjoy the good things life gives me. I guess that’s why nothing like this has happened to me before. I don’t deserve to be treated so nicely, I’m only going to waste the shots Fate so kindly gives me._

Once she arrived home, she went straight to her bed, put some comforting songs on and enjoyed the solitude to let herself cry how much she wanted. Her mind wasn’t the safest place at that moment and she was feeling pretty much useless and stupid.

Earlier that day, she had allowed herself to feel an amount of determination and positiveness she had never felt before, and she truly believed that she could change, that she could improve, this time.

But perhaps stupid girls like her are only meant to live within their fantasies.

 

♡♡♡

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to try and update the fic every friday, but I might post the other chapters sooner if things turn out well!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading it! Any kudos and comments are appreciated <3 <3 <3


	3. III.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! ~~
> 
> I realised I haven't properly said it yet but this story is going to focus not only on maturing and love, but also on friendship! Friendship is going to be an important topic throughout the story, as I really really want to explore all of the girls bond and care for the others in the group ^-^
> 
> And secondly, this story is going to be 10 chapters long! I already planned all of them and my intention is to update twice a week.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, which is way bigger than the others! <3

**III.**  

After crying herself to sleep, the day had gone and it was now Thursday, but Jiwoo couldn't make herself get out of bed.

She had cried most of the night before, feeling sorry for herself while listening to some depressing songs. It was kinda comforting, is she could say so, but sadly not very healing.

Since it was impossible to leave her body and avoid facing herself, Jiwoo decided to take an easy way out of this situation: she skipped her classes that day. Because at least avoiding to face her classmates and the place where she embarrassed herself, she could.

Her parents didn't mind, like usual. Perhaps they haven't even noticed she is still at home instead of at school. And it's not like she has any friends there to worry or even notice her absence, either. Jiwoo many times felt invisible to the world, but unfortunately only the feeling is not enough to make her actually disappear. Life has never been this easy.

Despite not going to school, she still woke up when her alarm clock rang, at 7 am.

The guilt of being irresponsible kept her from going back to sleep, so she just stayed in bed, lazily checking for any update on her social media profiles. But whoever is awake at that time of the day, is either too busy or too sleepy to care about updating their status, so there was nothing new. Even her idols didn’t grace her with new posts.

Jiwoo is so useless that she doesn’t even know what she could do to entertain herself on a day off.

 _10:37 am_ \-- and she had already gotten out of bed, prepared a nice breakfast filled of comforting food, took a shower, cleaned her room and streamed her favorite group’s slept on music videos. Sigh. Nothing seems to work out to get that feeling of _I should be doing something else_ out of her chest.

Jiwoo was still feeling ashamed of her behaviour the day before, but running away from her attitude is making her restless. That’s not the brand new personality she was determined to have. Running away just means she is still ignoring her problems, she’s still being passive about life. Jiwoo doesn’t want to feel this way anymore.

Then she had an idea.

She remembered that she may not know TLOHL’s name yet but yesterday she did make some progress, at least! Jiwoo was so immersed in the bad, terrible, pathetic, _tragic_ thing she had done, that she had completely forgotten what she was doing before TLOHL arrived. Or rather, _who_ she was talking to. Im Yeojin. The headstrong girl, sister of one of TLOHL friend’s friend. And from what she witnessed, the two seemed close to each other, as well.

Jiwoo had a name. Jiwoo had a location. Jiwoo had made progress, despite being an anxious weirdo. Thing’s can get better if only she forgives herself and try to get out of that negative state of mind. Things could be okay.

Jiwoo sat in front of her computer, stretched her fingers, rubbed her hands together and then got down to work.

 

♡♡♡

 

_“You’re wearing the worst disguise I have ever seen in my life”_

Jiwoo froze. Fuck. She knew she wasn’t supposed to have left her house.

See, if anyone had told her that she would end up in this kind of situation earlier that day, she would have laughed at their faces.

All of the hours she had spent awake at this particular day were a mess, a roller-coaster of emotions. And now, to make matters worse, she got found out in the middle of her brand new plan, by one of the last people in the world that was supposed to recognize her. Shit.

Once Jiwoo got her head out of her ass and started to do something useful instead of feeling sorry for herself, she managed to stalk all of Im Yeojin’s social media.

The thing is, Jiwoo is not just an average “stalker”. When it comes to finding informations and people online, she’s the bestest of the best. She’s patient and she can locate anything if she has the right tools and keywords. Easy peasy. But, lamentably, this Im Yeojin girl is the kind of person all of the curious and bored people on the internet hates: she locks all of her accounts.

Despite her profile picture on twitter and instagram, and a very relatable bio on both websites ( _“I’m quite bad at expressing myself”)_ , Jiwoo couldn’t find anything. She couldn’t even access her followings because Internet Sucks. And privacy sucks too. Actually, Everything Sucks. Ugh.

But at least, on her facebook page she could see some of the pages she liked, and one of them was none other than her school’s one. Interesting.

On the school’s page, there was an old post informing the times of the clubs and sports activities, _including_ the relay race. Jiwoo could work with that. They had training everyday after classes were over, which Jiwoo was grateful for. That gives her more opportunities of meeting TLOHL again, once she’s ready. Practising everyday must not be something easy, though, Jiwoo is already feeling tired for behalf of the girls. She’ll never understand the athletics kind.

And that was how she had the great idea of going to school in the afternoon, disguised and carrying her camera, in order to find out more things about the team and to try and find informations about TLOHL too. And also not to lose her dignity by showing her face in that environment so soon. Jiwoo might have a plan now and might have been distracted, but the shame remains. She plans never to let her face be seen near that area of school again, thank you very much.

“Seriously Jiwoo, why the stupid disguise? You’re so weird.” Yeojin asked her again, after Jiwoo ignored her first attempt at starting a conversation.

Jiwoo isn’t wearing a “stupid disguise”… Is she? After realising that only going to school again would ease her restlessness, she decided to wear the “go-to” kit anyone not trying to be seen wears: big sunglasses, a cap and a mask; alongside the school uniform she had to wear, of course. She was sure she wouldn’t be found out looking like this since no one gives a shit about her at school anyway. Or so she thought.

Being the controlled person she is, Jiwoo answered the girl with the first thing her nerves made her speak: “Jiwoo? I don’t know any Jiwoos, you must be mistaking me for someone else!!”

But when she was just turning around to hurriedly leave, Yeojin tried to stop her, by lighting touching her shoulder.

“Jiwoo, I have no idea what’s going on with you but... don’t run away again. Please.” Yeojin looked her in the eye, leaking sincerity. So Jiwoo allowed herself to accept that maybe the girl really means it because it’s almost like she.. _cares_ about her. Whatever are her reasons to.

So, this time, she didn’t leave. She couldn’t, not after looking at the sincerity in her eyes. She proceeded then to take off the accessories (which may be indeed making her look a bit stupid or whatever) and put them in her bag. Now, looking like herself again, she could answer the girl, without bullshit.

“I'm sorry, for leaving yesterday. Sometimes I get scared and that's the only reaction I have. I'm sorry for causing the most terrible first impression.” Jiwoo managed to answer, feeling ashamed once again for being unable to control her instincts to leave and run away from everything that she cannot control.

“You don't need to worry about that, really. I understand that people can be a bit overwhelming sometimes..” Yeojin told her with sincerity. “Besides, I should be the one apologizing. I wasn't very welcoming yesterday, I'm sorry for intimidating you. I guess I'm too defensive with the girls.. People haven't been very kind to the team, and I want to protect them from any haters or pervs or just anyone with bad intentions..”

Jiwoo widened her eyes at that and hurried to defend herself: “WHAT? NO, NO, I SWEAR I'M NOT A PERV I WASN'T---"

Which only made Yeojin just as restless and she quickly replied, trying to make things clear: “WAIT OH NO I DIDN'T MEAN IT THAT WAY I SWEAR I DIDN'T IT'S JUST THAT THERE HAVE BEEN SOME CREEPS BEFORE AND--"

“I WAS JUST AMAZED BY THEIR TALENT THEY ARE SO GOOD I WOULD NEVER EVER DISRESPECT--"

“I KNOW I KNOW I'M SORRY YOU DIDN'T SEEM LIKE A CREEP I'M JUST SUSPICIOUS OF EVERYONE--”

A beat passes and suddenly both of them stopped their yelling, looked each other in the eye and started to laugh. Loudly. They were being a ridiculous mess, there was no reason to get so startled by this confusion. Jiwoo laughed so much that tears started to get out of her eyes. It seemed like she wasn’t the only anxious weirdo at this school.

“Oh God, we’re such a mess.” Yeojin said, trying to stop laughing. “Will we ever have a normal conversation?”

“At this rate, I highly doubt, but who cares?” Jiwoo smiled. “And thanks for the laughs by the way, I really needed them.” Jiwoo answered with sincerity. It’s really nice to laugh about things with someone else beside you, instead of only laughing at your computer or cellphone screen.

“So.. About that.. Are you going to tell me what happened? I heard you skipped classes today.”

“How do you even know this? You don’t even study at this school!” Jiwoo was genuinely curious.

“Well, after you so strangely left, we were all confused and I got even a bit mad, I might admit. I was still suspecting you were up to no good, although I couldn’t know exactly why.” Yeojin told her, somewhat ashamed even though she was trying very hard to hide it. “So when the girl’s training ended I told them about what had happened and 2Jin said they saw you and told me you’re from the same class.”  

“Wait.. Who’s TwoJin? Aren’t you talking about Heejin or Hyunjin? I recognized them too and I guess that’s what amazed me more, because I had no idea they were athletes.” Jiwoo told her part of the truth.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I completely forgot. The girls and I are used to call them 2Jin because it’s easier, since they are always together anyway. The two may be cute, but I’m so sick of them and their stupid heart eyes for each other. We are all tired of constantly third-wheeling them.” Yeojin rolled her eyes.

Jiwoo gaped. “Wait a minute, are you telling me that they are together? As in.. In a relationship???”

Yeojin looked at Jiwoo like she had 3 heads and a green skin. “Do you even have eyes? You guys are from the same class and you still didn’t know? The girls told me you were reserved and always on your phone, but I had no idea you were actually BLIND.” Yeojin told her, impatient like always. The girls were all over each other all the time, they were the farthest thing from _subtle_ and yet…

“I guess I really need to observe my surroundings better.. It’s been 3 weeks but yesterday was actually the first time I explored the school. And you could say the same about people, I’m not very close to anyone in my classes, all we have is small talk.” Jiwoo was embarrassed to say it out loud, but she didn’t want to hide those things from Yeojin. This girl’s personality transmitted a peculiar energy, that made Jiwoo want to be nothing but honest. So she was trying to.

“You must have your reasons but it’s a shame it took you so long. You study in a fantastic place and you should appreciate it! I can’t wait to study here next year, these groundings already feel like home.” Yeojin dreamily looked at her surroundings and then closed her eyes, to enjoy the cool breeze. She must really, really love this school.

After a while, she completed: “Is that the reason why you have your camera right now? To capture the places you’re visiting?”

If she was being honest, by now Jiwoo had already forgotten she was even carrying her camera around her neck. Which only made things worse, as she didn’t have a pre-made excuse to be carrying it. She and Yeojin were doing so well, she couldn’t scare her by saying that the reason why she was carrying her camera was that she was hoping to find her unnamed friend and take a few pictures of her. No. Jiwoo would sound like a creep and a stalker. Which.. Coming to think of it now, that was exactly what she would be if she took pictures of her without permission. Yeah, she shouldn’t do that, it’s wrong. Jiwoo felt terrible for even considering it.

“Hmm, kind of? I’m actually here to take some pictures to send as my application for the Photography Club at the school.” She doesn’t even know why she said that, but it was the first thing that came to her mind and Jiwoo decided to just roll with it.

Not suspecting a thing, Yeojin actually responded with enthusiasm: “That’s really cool! I’m glad you decided to change things up a bit, it mustn’t have been easier. You should feel proud of yourself.”

This answer surprised Jiwoo. She _was_ indeed trying to change her life and improving herself, but her resolutions haven’t left her thoughts yet. It’s the first time she’s hearing them being said out loud. So being praised by this girl she hardly knows made her feel all warm inside, she was feeling very grateful. She smiled at Yeojin, hoping she would understand how much her words meant to her.

“You know what, I’ve just got an idea. Would you like to have a little tour around here? I can show you all of my unnie’s favorite places! And you can take your pictures too, if you want.” Yeojin seemed excited and Jiwoo enjoyed the idea, too. Would be fun to have some company and she really hopes she and Yeojin can become friends. She likes her energy.

So Jiwoo accepted the proposal by shouting a “Yes, I’d love to!” and giving a little jump in excitement, similar to the one that made Yeojin suspicious of her the day before. But, this time, she only laughed and said “Come on, let’s go. But I have one condition.”

“And what is it?”

“Don’t ever run away like yesterday again. Seriously, Yves and I got so confused. And she took it worse than me, actually. She was scared and sure she had done something wrong. I haven’t seen her like this since… I mean, she’s sensitive to being disliked by others. It’s rude to leave like that, so keep that in mind.”

Yeojin was speaking in a serious tone but Jiwoo’s attention dispersed the moment she heard that name. _Yves_. It must be her, right? She knew the names of everyone who were nearby yesterday and this one is new. This has to be her name! And what a beautiful name, it suits TLOHL perfectly. Jiwoo’s heart was racing and she began to feel butterflies in her stomach just by knowing this information. Wow.

But.. Wait a minute.. Did Yeojin say she made TLO-- Yves, scared? Shit. Jiwoo can’t believe she not only made a fool of herself the first time she met the girl of her dreams but she also managed to make her feel bad. Jiwoo is a lost case. She hopes it was just a temporary feeling, though. They’ve met for such a little time, Jiwoo surely isn’t that important to affect her life, is she? She hopes not. At least, not in that negative way. She needs to fix this.

“It honestly wasn’t my intention to make Y-Y-Yves feel bad. I’m so sorry. And yes, I promise I won’t run away again. I don’t know what got into me, I apologize.” Jiwoo answered after a while, with her head down and in a low tone. And she stuttered like a fool this first time pronouncing Yves name. The sound tastes so sweet coming from her mouth, but she got nervous.

Yeojin’s voice softened after this answer, and she lightly held Jiwoo’s hand for a second to comfort her and said: “It’s okay, don’t be too hard on yourself. There’s going to be more opportunities for you to make it up to her, don’t worry.”

The thought of meeting Yves and the girls again made Jiwoo open a smile. She hopes Yeojin’s words are true. That they are going to meet again (multiple times!) and that she’s going to be able to make a better second impression. It’s all she wants.

She smiled at the younger girl again and managed to say: “Thank you. But I also have one condition to accept your little tour.”

“Okay, go ahead.”

“You and I need to become friends.” Jiwoo finally said, in a shy but determined tone.

Yeojin was surprised by the answer. She looked back at Jiwoo with watered eyes and answered with a smile: “Of course.”

Then Jiwoo held out her pinky finger. “Promise?”

Both of them were almost crying by now, surprised by all of their emotions. Jiwoo was glad she wasn’t alone on her sentimental mess. It seemed like Yeojin was just as lonely as she was, because she got too taken aback by the thought of this random girl she hardly knows wanting to become her _friend_. She was feeling happy. It’s surreal but lovely.

“I promise.” And she laced their pinky fingers together, sealing the commitment.

After drying their eyes and pretending none of the crying had happened, both of the girls walked together through Jiwoo’s huge school, in the tour Yeojin had promised.

In between laughs, teasings, jokes and many pictures, both of them realised that they had indeed started a beautiful friendship.

 

♡♡♡

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading this fic!
> 
> I'm still unsure of how I'm writing this story so please, any feedback is more than welcomed!
> 
> The next update is probably going to be up this sunday, so wait for it~~
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! And you can always talk to me on twitter: @JiniusLab
> 
> <3


	4. IV.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided not to make any promises of when I'm going to post the next chapters, for my own good. 
> 
> I'm terrible at keeping my own schedules >_<
> 
> Happy valentines day, by the way! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter <3

**IV.**

The very next day, Jiwoo was determined to focus on the task she had promised her friend (!) she would: paying more attention to her surroundings.

And she decided to start by observing her classmates. Or rather, two classmates in special: Heejin and Hyunjin. Or 2Jin, like Yeojin told her they are called. And so she did just that.

Since the beginning of the classes of that day, she subtly kept looking at the two girls, trying to notice anything that could be useful for her investigation -- and also to just get to know them, as they seem to be very nice. Now that Jiwoo has become friends with Yeojin, she started to wonder how would it be if she was friends with the other girls, as well. She would really, _really,_ love that.

The day before, when she and Yeojin were walking around the school, the other kept telling Jiwoo - without even realising - some random facts about the girls in the relay race team.

She told her how ViVi is the most lovely person she has ever met. That she loves cute animals, specially deers. And that she gets all jumpy and bubbly everytime she eats sweets that has the same pastel pink color as her hair.

Yeojin also commented how Heejin is always very enthusiastic and eager to learn different things from different areas, and how Hyunjin has two cats, a black one named Luna and a white one named Artemis. ( _Yes, just like in Sailor Moon. We are all big nerds like that._ She had told her. -- Which only made Jiwoo like them more.).

She also said that Hyunjin is a big fan of earrings, and that Heejin constantly jokes that when she proposes, instead of giving her a fancy engagement ring, she’s going to give her a beautiful pair of expensive earrings. They all act like it’s nothing but a joke, but Yeojin admitted that she is counting the days until this indeed happens.

But the one Yeojin couldn’t really stop talking about is Haseul, her half-sister. She truly idolizes her, she’s the most amazing and powerful heroine in her eyes. And Jiwoo thinks this is very sweet.  

From what she gathered, Haseul is indeed an extraordinary human being. She can play the guitar, piano, sing, dance, she is the leader of the race team. And she also can speak english and japanese, not to mention that on her free time she usually goes to an animal shelter to do volunteer work. Oh, and she’s also the coolest sister. Because she is strict when she has to be, but she never tries to use her age to take control over Yeojin, she treats her with care but also with respect. Plus she never snitches Yeojin to their parents, which the other said is what makes she love her sister even more.

Jiwoo was fascinated about Haseul, she really sounded like a superwoman. But.. There was a fact about her that made Jiwoo’s heart stop a beat.

 

♡♡♡

_“Oh, and my sister is a year ahead of you, did you know that? She’s from the same class as Sooyoung. I mean.. Yves. I keep forgetting she rather be called by this nickname now.”_

_Jiwoo was feeling tense and her heart was beating very fast. She tried to hide it, but just the thought that by trying to act casual she only exposed herself more, made she get even more tense._

_“R-r-really? S-s-she’s the girl from yesterday, isn’t she?” She was trying to act casual and now she blew it all by fucking stuttering. Congratulations, Jiwoo. You’re the worst person at hiding crushes in the world._

_But if Yeojin noticed something was off, she didn’t say anything. She just kept talking, because apparently that’s what she loves to do. And Jiwoo is grateful and can relate._

_“Yes! I’m going to introduce you guys properly someday. And to the other girls, too! You’re gonna love them, I’m pretty sure!” Yeojin really did love those girls. From the excited and proud way she talks about them, they seemed to be like jewelry to her eyes. It’s lovely._

_Then she completed, her tone a bit darker and secretive this time: “Although.. I’ve never been really close to Hasu. Her full name is Ha Sooyoung, by the way, that’s where this nickname originates from. Recently she started to ask to be called by Yves, although she never complains whenever we call her by her real name. She just says the nickname fits her better or something. She and Haseul study together since elementary school. They were never that close to begin with, but then that thing happened and they got even more distant.”_

_Yeojin finished the sentence talking like she herself was far away, in another dimension. It was like she drowned inside her mind, thinking hard about something. Or rather, thinking hard about ‘that thing’ she was talking about._

_Jiwoo was intrigued. But she got anxious and decided not to ask anything more about that, since it seemed like Yeojin didn’t want to extend this subject. Jiwoo sensed Yeojin was talking about this mostly to herself, not meaning to let the words come out of her mouth. Weird._

_Yeojin then quickly changed subjects and proceeded to keep talking about how she and her sister reunited, though, all thanks to ViVi and Yves’ friendship._

_Every time she heard Yves’s name, Jiwoo felt butterflies in her stomach and she got pretty nervous. Yeojin probably didn’t realise the changes, but Jiwoo kept trying very hard to act collected. But alongside the butterflies, now there was also a sinking feeling in her stomach, that’s worried about ‘that thing’ that happened to her angel 2 years before._

_Whatever had happened to her, Jiwoo hopes from the bottom of her heart that Yves is okay now._

 

♡♡♡

Jiwoo got lost in her thoughts again.

She just can’t help it. Every time she thinks about the girls, she thinks about Yves, too. Jiwoo is amazed by all of them and wishes to befriend them, but Yves has always been different in her eyes. Yves had started everything, even though Jiwoo’s new plans aren’t just to get closer to her anymore. She wants to know the others better because they are interesting and seem to be alike her, not only as a means to join Yves’ inner circle of friends.

But even though all of them are interesting, there seems to be a mysterious aura around Yves. She’s not only a pretty, marvellous, gorgeous, cute, intriguing girl, but it almost seems like she’s hiding something.

Yves is a complex and deep human being in Jiwoo’s eyes, and if she was being honest, all she wants is to drown in herself, to get to know her soul better. But she probably should stop pining for her and focus on her main mission for the day: to observe her classmates in detail so that she could feel like she’s part of this school and not just a fleeting student that is not emotionally connected to anyone. Or something like that, not to sound so dramatic.

Jiwoo is very capable of focusing on other things, of course she is. So she shook her head to distance those random thoughts, put on some invisible glasses and mentally started to sing Mulan’s soundtrack.

_Let’s get down to business._

 

♡♡♡

Jiwoo is in love. With someone else’s love. Is this even possible?

After observing Heejin and Hyunjin for a few hours, Jiwoo is certain that the two girls are nothing but soulmates. They are simply the sweetest couple in the whole galaxy, not to mention relationship goals. Who the hell actually chooses to hold hands at any chance they get instead of playing with their phones? That’s true love, y’all. It truly is.

Lunchtime is coming and Jiwoo would be eating alone, once again. But the thing is, Jiwoo wants to befriend them, badly. And she’s tired of always being by herself. But only waiting and observing won't do the job. She needs to fight for the things she wants, otherwise they will never come.

So she held tight to the trail carrying her food and slowly approached their table.

There was another girl sat with them, one Jiwoo is sure is from their same class. But what’s her name again? Something like… Yerim? She guesses so. The three of them seemed to be having fun, they were laughing out loud because of something the other brown haired girl had said. And even though their laughs only made Jiwoo more insecure, she didn’t let this awful feeling win. All she needs to do is be brave and say a simple “hi”, then see where things would lead.

“Hey” Jiwoo shyly said. “Can I sit with you guys?”

Like the soulmates they are, Heejin and Hyunjin answered at the same time, as soon as they noticed her: “HEY, JIWOO!!! Of course you can, silly!”. Then they looked at each other’s eyes and laughed a bit more because of their wonderful timing.

 _Life appears to be always funny when you’re in love_ , Jiwoo thought, amazed.

“Don’t worry, they are always like this. You’ll get used soon enough!” The other girl told her, wearing a playful smile. From what Jiwoo had observed earlier in classes, she’s always cheerful and smiling about something. “My name is Choi Yerim, by the way! But you can call me Choerry, for shorts. I’m so glad we finally met, the girls kept telling me all about Yeojin’s new friend!”

Jiwoo sat at the table, beside Yerim. Then she properly introduced herself to her, even though apparently she didn’t have to. Jiwoo was enjoying this light and playful energy a lot.

“I mean, it’s not like we enjoy gossiping but--” Heejin started, but got softly interrupted by her girlfriend.

“You _do_ enjoy gossiping, baby.” Which only made her give another heart eyes to the girl, alongside a small smile.

“Yeah, okay, okay, I do love to gossip, but I couldn’t help telling Yerim about this! Two days ago Yeojin couldn’t shut up about her crazy suspicions that _someone_ might have sent you to sabotage the team or gather informations about us or something. It was hilarious! That girl is paranoid, I swear.” She laughed, in a light tone.

“And she had done this before, actually. It took _months_ for us to convince her Hasu wasn’t a bad person, that she had changed. But Yeojin couldn’t stop suspecting her in that time period.” Hyunjin completed. “But look at both of you now! You needed just one day to break through her walls and become her friend, wow! It’s a record!”

“You must be really special. This girl can be absurdly intimidating. I, myself, don’t even dare to approach her, I did it once and she couldn’t stop staring at me, like a tiny Sherlock Holmes analysing people. Since then, I decided it’s safer to keep a distance.” Yerim said, making a funny facial expression. She pretended to be scared by Yeojin, with her eyes wide opened, as a joke.

 _Hasu_. Her name again, starring in an ambiguous story. Jiwoo is surely going to find out more about her past, but now is not the time. Now is the time to take care of herself and to make more friends. Jiwoo took a mental note of everything she heard but right now she wanted to enjoy herself, too.

“Guys, please, don’t be too harsh! Deep down you all know she’s just a tiny fluffly ball, full of love. She can’t help but being too overprotective. But once you talk to her you realise that she’s nothing but a dork. Trust me, there’s nothing to be scared of, Yerim.” Jiwoo tried to play along, teasing her friend. If Yeojin ever heard that she called her a “tiny fluffly ball” she would try to end their friendship on the spot. Too bad pinky promises aren’t broken that easily. She’d have to endure.

All of them laughed at that and Jiwoo felt warm inside, like she belonged to this group.

“You’re planning to join the photography club, aren’t you?” Choerry asked her, a while later.

Jiwoo got nervous. She had only used that as an excuse the day before, but while she was taking pictures of the school, she felt really good. Some time ago, she had studied a few things about photography online, just for fun, but she had never actually _considered_ taking this hobbie a little bit more seriously. Not until now.

“Yes, yes, I’m thinking about it. But I’m still not sure.” She answered, honestly.

“Oh, but you should join it! Please! I’ve already sent out my application, then we could spend more time together! My friend, Jinsol, is an year older and she’s in the club since she was a freshman, and she keeps telling me wonders about the projects and activities!” Yerim kept insisting, in a cute, whiny, excited way. Jiwoo is amazed by how this girl appears to have a thousand personalities at the same time. It’s endearing. She’s always so enthusiastic and cute, kinda like a puppy. “It’s going to be funnnnnn! Come on, Chuu, don’t think about it too much, you know you want to apply!”

“Chuu?” Jiwoo asked, curious. They’ve hardly met and now she is giving her a nickname?

“Yeah, that’s Choerry for you. She loves to give everyone she meets new nicknames.” Hyunjin told her.

“Actually, she’s the one that created our ship name, 2Jin. Isn’t she the sweetest?” Heejin said, petting Yerim’s head. The girl just closed her eyes and opened up a soft smile, enjoying the affection.

 _No. Definitely like a puppy._ Jiwoo thought.   

“It just a fluffy way of saying ‘Jiwoo’, do you get it? You needed a short and cute nickname to match your personality. What do you think of it?” Yerim then said, still enjoying Heejin fondly caressing her hair.

Then all three of them looked at Jiwoo, expectantly.

While Yerim looked like a puppy, always full of energy and very extroverted, Heejin and Hyunjin were outgoing and warm in a more introverted way, so they resembled more like little kittens. Or maybe she could say that Heejin was like a rabbit, though, taking into consideration the cute way she scrunches her nose. All that Jiwoo knows is that by watching all three of them looking at her with their big eyes, inside she gets the feeling that she wants nothing more than to adopt them.

“I absolutely LOVE it! It’s the bestest nickname ever!” Jiwoo finally answered, vivaciously. She couldn’t be happier, she really loved this cute name, “Chuu”. She loved even more that someone - a friend? - had thought of it, just for her. It’s perfect.

Then all three of them animatedly got up at the same time and hurried to bury Chuu in a warm bear hug. They were also happy that she enjoyed the endearment.

The girls were so adorable and so willing to shower Jiwoo with love that, in that moment, while she was receiving tight hugs by three wonderful girls she hardly knows -- and hugging them back just as tight --, Chuu could say that she felt so happy she thought she was going to explode.

At the end of the day, it seemed like _she_ was the one that ended up being adopted by them.

♡♡♡

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk if this is news or not, but one day I realised what was the reason behind Jiwoo's stage name!  
> Her name is written in hangul as 지우, but Jiwoo can also be written as 쥬, like Jiwoo from KARD writes in her instagram profile. And the hangul for Chuu is 츄, which is just a different and more cute way of pronouncing the name~~~
> 
> Anyways, what did you guys think about this chapter? Slowly the other girls are going to be introduced, I can't wait until I write all of them together! Perhaps before this fic ends the 12th girl might even make an appearance, I hope so <3
> 
> Thank you so much for reading!


	5. V.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking so long to update the fic, I wasn't very well last week and now college is taking over me ;; but this chapter is huge, the biggest so far, to compensate!
> 
> I hope you all enjoy it! <3

**V.**

A few weeks had passed since her friendship with Yeojin had begun and Jiwoo was as happy as ever. 

One of the best things about being Yeojin’s friend is the crazy texts messages they exchange, constantly. The other seems to be online just as often as Jiwoo, so they talked non-stop. Be it to tell the other about how boring their classes are or to update her about her application to the photography club. Or even to exchange cute videos of fluffy animals. Yeojin has the weird habit of enjoying to watch videos of cute little frogs and - as peculiar at it was - it’s completely okay, because Jiwoo herself has always liked to watch and share videos of funny, adorable penguins. 

And the best part about their friendship is that Yeojin, just like her, sometimes gets tired of answering to messages but keeps being online. Which is just perfect because Jiwoo is the same; she is social but also needs her space sometimes, and to do things at her own pace. The two are honestly a match made in heaven. No wonder they are the bestest of friends.

The last few weeks were nice. And full of events. But not a series of unfortunate events, thankfully, no. She was just… Busy. Many things had happened all at once and, even though some changes are welcomed and for the best, when your life suddenly turns upside down, it can be a bit overwhelming, to speak the truth. Jiwoo just needed some time to assimilate everything that has been going on, that’s all.

Good news is that, after Choerry’s very convincing and heart whelming methods of convincement, Jiwoo finally made up her mind and decided to indeed send an application to the Photography Club. And.. Guess what? She got in! Yay!

The club activities had started two weeks ago, and she goes there twice a week. Yerim got accepted as well, and the two had become closer friends because of that. She’s very fun and friendly, which helped Jiwoo to quickly get out of her shell when she’s near her, since day one. She had also introduced Jiwoo to the older friend of hers, Jinsol, she had mentioned while she was trying to convince her to join the club. 

At first, Jinsol’s beauty and her constant piercing glaze intimidated Jiwoo, so she didn’t know how to behave near her. It was all very awkward. Actually… It still kinda is. But Jiwoo is going to get there, eventually. She had already made friends with so many new people lately, a thing she wouldn’t have believed she would be able to do some months ago. And for that reason, she’s trying to calm herself down when her social anxiety attacks. She doesn’t have to befriend every single person she meets, right? There’s nothing wrong with not being able to connect with everyone at first, those things usually take time. She’s making progress and that’s all that matters, by now.

When you’re an introvert, having extroverted friends can be a blessing. But a curse, too, at times. Extroverted and unshy people can - and do! - balance introverted, shy ones. It’s very helpful to have a friend or someone you can rely on when you’re having trouble behaving certain ways, in certain situations. Someone outgoing and talkative can be very precious and helpful to make reserved and usually quiet individuals speak more and to meet new people. And the opposite happens as well, of course. Introspective and timid people are the perfect company to inspire their unreserved, social friends to reach their internal world and to be more independent and reflective. It’s a two way street. Everyone should befriend different types of people, because you can learn a lot from them. And Jiwoo is happy to be doing just that, she feels like she’s growing a lot from the change of atmosphere and from not being so lonely, anymore. 

Now that she’s surrounded by friends whenever she’s not at home, Jiwoo had opened her eyes and realised how solitary she actually had been, all those years. Even when she lived in her old city, Cheongju, she didn’t have that many friends. Of course she used to have some small talks with her peers, she used to be friendly with everyone. But she couldn’t go too far as to say that those people were her “friends”, that’s a too strong of a word. Besides… Even though she usually tries not to think about that, the truth is that people didn’t really  _ like _ her at her old school. 

One day after she presented a project in front of everyone, a couple of her classmates started to call her stupid names. They had started with some small negative commentaries, saying how “weird” she is or telling others how she had an “ET head”. Jiwoo felt terrible, but she thought everyone would just forget about the nicknames, it would surely pass. And it should. It did, actually. The first rounds of nicknames got old, and then a new wave started. More people joined the voices, this time. They made fun of her manners, saying  _ “you’re so fake, who are you trying to copy pretending to be all bubbly and jumpy like that? You couldn’t get more dumb.” _  And she stopped, she was hiding inside her shell more at every day.  _ “You’re so quiet, did the cat eat your tongue? Can you even speak? What’s so interesting about this stupid book of yours?”.  _ Nothing she ever did was enough to stop the talks, the nicknames, the buzz. She constantly “lost” her backpack, her notes, her books or earphones and yet none of it was enough for them. The only time she had peace at school was when she was inside her made up fantasy world, it was when she was with her idol’s or favorite character’s company. That beautiful and comforting world was only hers and nobody could get in or bother her in there. Her fantasies have always been her happy place. 

Her classmates often told her she was foolish for constantly having her head up in the clouds, but Jiwoo didn’t mind them. Being a dreamer was the only thing that saved her from all the shit that was going on. So, yes, now that she’s in a better place she can say for sure: she’s proud of who she is. She’s proud of her personality and grateful for being herself. She won’t let those ignorant monsters from her past get inside her head ever again. She has to endure and let things go, even though they aren’t so easy to forget. 

Jiwoo has friends now. Jiwoo is in a different city, away from everything and everyone that had hurted her. And she’s getting better, although there are some days - like this one - that she rather stay low-key and quiet. She likes being social but she doesn't have to make this a burden.

Being in the photography club has been a joy, Jiwoo is excited about learning so much about this art and for being able to explore her creativity in such a fun way. 

Why does she always over thinks the things she does?      

 

♡♡♡

 

As soon as the club activities were over that afternoon, Jiwoo hurriedly packed all her things and discreetly walked to the door, in order to leave the classroom without being noticed. She wasn't feeling very social at the moment and all she wanted was to go home so she wouldn't have to think about all these people and her need to always fit in.

But just as she was quietly passing through the door, she bumped into another girl from the class, who apparently had a plan very similar to Jiwoo’s.

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” The blonde said in a worried voice, bowing to apologize.

“It’s okay, don't worry about that.” Jiwoo answered, now worried herself after seeing the girl’s anxious expression. She smiled at her and thankfully the other smiled in return.

They walked out of the class together, in silence, since they were taking the same way to their lockers. 

The blonde girl was very tall and thin, and she walked in a very flowy and elegant way, even though she demonstrated to be very shy, as her body language was always contained and closed off. She was very, very beautiful. But her beauty is not as intimidating and strong as Jinsol’s, she is beautiful in a softer way. Her appearance resembles someone warm and cute, whom you would want to protect at all costs.

And that's why Jiwoo was taken by surprise once they reached their lockers. Because when the girl opened hers, a few rows away from Jiwoo’s, she rested her head in its shelf, believing its little door would be enough to hide her, and sighed loudly. That only made Jiwoo want to protect this girl even more.

“Uhmmm…. Chaewon? Is everything all right?” Jiwoo approached her and asked, unsure if she should do this or not.

Jiwoo’s voice seemed to have taken Chaewon by surprise, because the girl raised her head and looked at her with shaken eyes. Jiwoo would dare to say that she had completely forgotten there was someone else near her. Perhaps her locker’s interior was a passage to Narnia so she's used to escape the external world while being surrounded by it's walls. Jiwoo had no idea.

“Oh, I thought I was by myself. I'm sorry.” She said with her delicate voice. 

Jiwoo insisted there was no need to apologize, she was just worried and that she was actually already on her way out.

“It's alright, I'm just relieved. That classroom was suffocating me, you know?” Chaewon sighed but after realising her words, then she felt the need to correct herself: “Not that there was something wrong, I actually love the club! But.. Sometimes things can get overwhelming for me. I'm really not used to the attention people give me. I love being recognized for my work but having everyone's eyes on me is so intimidating. I felt scared today.” 

Wow. Jiwoo would have never thought. 

Actually, what she means is that during today’s activities, while their mentor was checking everyone’s latest pictures, he felt really, really,  _ really _ impressed by Chaewon’s photos. And the girl is indeed absurdly talented. The mentor asked if she could show her pictures to the class and Chaewon had nodded in agreement. So the mentor showed them and showered the girl with compliments and asked everyone if they had some insights about her work. Some people had some theories and then for some minutes everyone was praising her and trying to interpret the reasons why she chose to photograph so many butterflies and pineapples and play with shadows in her photographies. 

Coming to think of it now, Jiwoo realised that the girl was actually very quiet during all of the discussions about her work. Occasionally she added something, said a reason for the theme, but always in low, short sentences. And Jiwoo knows the reason now. She would have never guessed the girl was this frightened, she just thought she was modest. 

People are always so much more complex than what your eyes can see in short periods of time.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Jiwoo managed to ask the girl, after making a dramatic scene of looking at both sides and then covering her mouth to speak the words, like she was a secret agent hiding from the government. And that made Chaewon laugh and relax a bit, so her mission was accomplished. “I totally get what you're feeling. I mean, I was also feeling suffocated in that class. Really. That's the reason we bumped at the door, both of us trying to run away as fast as we could. Funny, isn't it?” 

Chaewon laughed a bit more. “I can't believe it!” 

“I'm serious! I wasn't praised or showered with compliments like you, my situation is totally different, but I couldn't wait until the activities were over. Sometimes, being surrounded by too many people at once overwhelms me and I get anxious. I felt like I couldn't breathe with everyone being so loud around me.” Jiwoo was honest. 

After observing Jiwoo for a while, the girl finally answered back: “I feel better now, knowing I'm not alone. You have a very bright aura, Jiwoo. Thank you a lot for making me feel normal and lighter. Really.” Chaewon bowed again, this time in gratitude and smiling. 

This gesture was too polite for Jiwoo, so she wasn't sure of how to answer properly, without embarrassing herself. Chaewon was graceful like precious porcelain, and Jiwoo was afraid of making a fool of herself near this girl that emanated such a royal aura. So she decided to be herself and answered with a “So are you, really!” in her usual, everyday, bubbly way of acting. 

Chaewon laughed a bit more and both of them felt happy and comfortable at each other's presence. They realised that perhaps it wasn't necessarily loneliness they seeked to be able to breathe in peace again, but actually just the company of someone that is also quiet and calm like them, that understood their current mood, was enough. 

A while later they said their goodbyes and Chaewon said she was looking forward to meeting Jiwoo more often at school, since they are from the same year, just from different classes. And Jiwoo really liked the idea. Talking with Chaewon was easy and she made her feel calm and warm inside because of her cute and thoughtful ways.

Jiwoo then decided she didn't want to go home anymore, she wanted to look for a nice and isolated place at the school so she could chill and recharge her energies by herself, instead of doing that in her bedroom. 

There was a couple hours left until the girls’ practice ended so Jiwoo decided that if then she felt like it, she would try and meet Yeojin to talk and maybe grab something to eat together.

But only if she was in the mood. If she was still in need of being by herself, then she would only go home, because friends understands each other’s needs when they are down and not meeting her should be okay too.

And she shouldn't feel obliged to do anything she doesn't want to, just because her mind convinces her that's what a healthy person would do.

Screw that.

♡♡♡

****  
  


Things were being great for Jiwoo. Wonderful, even. 

She had spent the last one hour or so sat alone in a recluse part of her school, peacefully reading a phenomenal book called  _ The Long Way To A Small Angry Planet _ , by an author named Becky Chambers, while she was recharging her energies. Jiwoo was finally relaxed after the stress and anxiety from earlier, and she was enjoying some deserved quality time by herself outdoors, reading lied down under a big tree. Things couldn’t go any wrong when you’re this serene, right?  _ Well.. No. _ Life always decides to surprise people in the most unexpected ways.

No one comes to this part of school. Or so Jiwoo thought. Out of nowhere, no one other than Ha Sooyoung showed up near where Jiwoo was resting. But she wasn’t alone. Alongside her, was ViVi, the cotton candy haired girl that was with her the day Jiwoo first saw Yves. And they were holding hands, once again. Actually, coming to think of it, most of the times they are together, Yves and ViVi are holding hands. And Jiwoo sees them together quite often. 

Clumsily, Jiwoo hurried to hide herself behind the tree she was lied down under a few moments prior. It’s not like she was trying to  _ spy on them _ or anything. Except, she totally was. And that wasn’t even the first time. Sue her -- or whatever. 

Jiwoo has a crush on Yves so, naturally, at every chance she gets, she keeps her eye on her. She’s always searching for the girl: in the morning, when she arrives at school; every time she gets out of class to go to the toilet; during her lunch breaks and at the afternoon, too, after classes and the clubs activities are over. Jiwoo got used to always use her “Yves-radar” to look for the girl of her dreams, since they unfortunately don’t take any classes together. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

And when she said she sees the two girls together quite often, Jiwoo is not exaggerating. Yves goes to the athleticism trainings from time to time, and all the times she goes she brings water and a towel to ViVi. And she cheers for her, too. A lot. The other girl gets all embarrassed and Yves keeps repeating that’s exactly the reason she does that, because ViVi gets all cute and pretty when she gets shy. Not to mention all the times she saw them together at lunch, always touching each other somehow, be it by holding hands or by Yves’s having an arm around the other girl’s shoulders. They are always side by side, without any personal space. Not to mention all the little giggles they share, it seems like they are always laughing together about something. Which totally reminds Jiwoo of 2Jin because they are-- WAIT A MINUTE.  _ Shit _ . That’s why the two reminds Jiwoo of Heejin and Hyunjin. Fuck. It all makes sense now.  _ Yves and ViVi are in a relationship. _ Holy fuck. Jiwoo is so slow to catch up on things like this.

Just as she reached this conclusion, Jiwoo took a look at the two girls one more time, from her hidden spot. Yves had her head rested on ViVi’s shoulder and they were still holding hands, sat under a big beautiful flowerful tree. This could -- and should -- be a cute scene, of a loving couple and bla bla bla. But Jiwoo has to be honest. She’s hating it. She had no problem of thinking of the two girls as close friends, best friends even, but now that she knows they are in a relationship, Jiwoo feels jealous and a little bit sad. Just a little bit, obviously. It’s not like her heart has been shattered in a million tiny pieces and is now unable to ever be repaired again. Of course not, Jiwoo is not that dramatic. Pff. But she can’t help but realise that Yves used to attack her heart with all those feelings she felt for her but, now, her heart is just breaking.

When she was just about to quietly leave her secret spot, another girl arrived. She was running, as if she was late for something. She had a long, platinum blonde hair. And she was carrying two beautiful sunflowers and a big bag. Jiwoo knows this girl, she’s from her same year, in a different class. But she’s also in the Photography Club and she’s always talking to Yerim and Jinsol. Jiwoo supposes she’s close to Chaewon too, she saw them together a few times.

As soon as Jungeun appeared on her field of vision, Yves quickly stood up and started to run in her direction. The other girl started to run faster, then, and they both collided in a strong, big bear hug. They kept hugging for a long time, and the blonde girl even caressed Yves’ hair, in affection. When they finally set apart, Yves’ smiled at the other girl. Then they met ViVi and Jungeun gave her one of the sunflowers and the other to Yves. All three of them seemed to be very intimate and happy to be together. And that opened Jiwoo’s eyes. 

It’s obvious what’s happening there and even more obvious why the atmosphere between the three girls seemed so special. Of course. Jiwoo is 100% sure: Yves’s doesn’t have  _ one _ girlfriend. She has  _ two. _ The three girls are undeniably in a polyamorous relationship.

Different from a few minutes ago, Jiwoo is feeling better about this. She has just decided she won’t let jealousy take over her and make she feel bad about the beautiful relationship the girls have. It’s not her place to. What right does she have to be heartbroken about something like this? Jiwoo and Yves doesn’t even  _ talk _ . They had exchanged some polite greetings but they still haven’t had any proper conversation. Not to mention that, even if they had had, nobody has the right to believe someone owes them something. Yves’ is a free girl. The two of them don’t have any type of relationship, she can do whatever she wants with her life.

It’s okay if Yves’ indeed has one or two or three girlfriends. It would be okay too even if she had a boyfriend. Jiwoo can’t make her crush on her stop from day to night, but she can and will try to control her jealousy. This is such a stupid feeling. She has to let the girl live, even in the version of her she has inside her head. Jiwoo is not okay but she has decided not to be sad anymore. This is a good thing. When you really care about someone, you want their happiness and wellbeing. And Yves’ looks really happy with ViVi and Jungeun. That’s all that matters. 

Jiwoo looked at her watch. It’s still early in the afternoon, which is just perfect. She might still catch Yeojin nearby. 

She needs to talk to her friend. Desperately. ****  
  


♡♡♡ ****  
  


When Jiwoo realised she needed to “talk” to Yeojin, apparently, what she really needed was her friend’s company, and not specifically to tell her about her newest discovery. 

“Hey, weirdo, how are you?” Yeojin had greeted her like usual, using one of their million lovely nicknames to each other.

“What’s up, little miss sunshine?” And Jiwoo greeted her back, feeling a bit better just from being together with her dear friend. She even hugged her, which is something new. And she enjoyed very much, even though her friend wasn’t really sure how to act back (but she still hugged her in return, as awkward and stiff as she was.)

Jiwoo wasn’t very well, but she is not sure if she’s ready to bring that subject up. At least not yet. If she discussed her realization with her friend, she would have to tell and explain her everything, since the beginning, of when she first saw Yves to all of her crazy plans to get to know her. Jiwoo doesn’t want to change the mood, since her friend seems to be very happy today.

So they chit-chatted for a while, talking nonsense like usual. 

“Did you know that the coach was looking for someone to take official pictures of the trainings and the athletics events and competitions? She says the team needs fancy social media pages, with updated pictures and all, because they are coming hard this season. That woman really cares about her pupil’s image and their promotions. I love her.” Yeojin was excited about this subject so surely there was more to it. “And guess what I said? That I have this cute, beautiful and talented friend who happens to enjoy photography and doesn’t have anything useful to do on her free time!” 

Jiwoo should be feeling offended about her friend’s accusation, but it was the truth anyway. She’s really unoccupied. And a job like this could actually…be quite useful. 

Earlier in the photography club, the mentor complimented Jiwoo on her pictures. He said that her landscapes pictures were very beautiful but she should get out of her comfort zone. In his words,  _ “what do you think about maybe photographing people? You can work on such different emotions and concepts, something a static background do not provide you. Have fun with your pictures, Jiwoo. Don’t just waste your potential by not taking risks” _ . And yeah, she may not have received as many compliments as Chaewon, but she quite liked this type of feedback. Perhaps life is giving her this chance of participating more in her environment, instead of just taking pictures of things that doesn’t change. She herself could use a change of concept, as well. 

“I’m going to think about it.” Jiwoo had answered. But she and Yeojin both knew she had already made up her mind.

They’ve spent some time in silence, and Jiwoo got lost inside her head again. How could she start telling her friend about what’s been bothering her? Speaking is so hard when the subject is too important. She feels like this might be a turning point in their friendship, and could either turn out pretty well or pretty badly. 

Just as she was about to start talking, so she could tell her  _ something _ before she goes insane, Yeojin interrupted her:

“Hey, Wooguin, let’s grab something to eat before I starve and die. My treat.”

It’s not very usual for her friend to call her by this made up nickname, which she created joining her own name with Jiwoo’s favorite animal. Perhaps she really have been too happy, as Jiwoo observed earlier.

And she’s not crazy to decline free food.  ****  
  


♡♡♡ ****  
  


It may not seem like it, but Yeojin  _ do _ have feelings. She doesn’t always uses her observation skills for the bad. When she cares about someone, she can make good use of her analytical mind and use her instincts to try and meet other people’s needs. And that was what had happened today, with Jiwoo.

Since she first saw her friend, she had noticed something was off.

She wasn’t very obvious about it, but Yeojin sensed something was worrying her. Jiwoo usually is very bright and bubbly, and she likes to talk. A lot. When she’s comfortable around someone, she doesn’t really shut up. Which Yeojin finds adorable, but today she wasn’t the same. She was taking too long to answer her, and she wasn’t elaborating her answers. Yeojin also noticed that she kept looking at nowhere when she thought she wasn’t paying attention on her, a clear sign that she was stuck inside her head.

So Yeojin decided to do something about it and invited her to their favorite hamburger place. She even offered to pay for her, just another sign that Yeojin is the best bestest friend this world has even seen. She’s proud of her plan. Not to mention that she was dying to eat some hamburgers, so she was smart enough to combine business with pleasure. By not making herself starve to death and also giving her friend some comfort food. She’s a mastermind.

Arriving at the place, she even bought Jiwoo a strawberry milkshake, as this is her favorite fruit. Yeojin doesn’t always know how to act in emotional situations that concerns other people, but she was worried and trying her best. She hopes it can be enough.

A few bites and some stolen sips of the milkshake later, Yeojin couldn’t take it anymore so she decided to ask her friend what was wrong. “Hey, Jiwoo, what happened? You know you can always count on me, right? I don’t like seeing you acting so strange like that.”

Jiwoo appeared to have been taken by surprise, like she wasn’t really expecting Yeojin to notice her change of mood.  _ She’s always so slow for catching up on things that matter _ , Yeojin thought. She loves her friend with all her heart, but it’s a bit sad how she never really expects people would consider her or even notice when she’s not well or anything. Yeojin is afraid to conclude that this happens because Jiwoo is not really used to being taken care of. She wants to change this.

Yeojin then, without thinking twice, took her friend’s hand and said, looking right into her eyes: “I’m here for you”. She hopes she can get the message across. Because she cares  _ deeply _ about this loser, she’s already like family to her. And that’s not something Yeojin says everyday.

After taking a deep breath and holding Yeojin’s hand back, Jiwoo started to talk. Luckily, she was back on her normal ways, so she talked a lot, which made Yeojin relax. She told Yeojin about her crush on Yves -- which she suspected, for a while. Jiwoo gets really nervous around the girl and she stutters and can’t speak properly. She’s so obvious. -- and then something about crazy plans and how they met and wow wow wow, she spoke a lot. There was too much information for Yeojin to swallow and she’s going to process them properly later. Yeojin was happy for her friend, though. And she was feeling relieved that she trusted her so much to the point of telling her all this.

Then she told her about how she got closer to all of the other girls as well, and then about the photography club, more about how Yeojin is the most perfect and amazing and flawless and life savior friend -- which she been knew -- and some many other details Yeojin listened with all the attention in the world. The last few months have been very busy to Jiwoo, Yeojin is amazed. She kept telling her more things but now Yeojin can’t believe in what she’s hearing. Because now Jiwoo is simply being  _ stupid. _

“What the fuck is wrong with you? I’ve always knew you had a weird and fertile imagination but I didn’t know you were actually high! Yves dating both ViVi and Jungeun? Where did you get this from? And you said you had ‘receipts’?” Yeojin couldn’t believe that was actually what Jiwoo had said. She takes it all back, her friend is fucking crazy.

“But I saw them today! They were so intimate and lovey dovey, and Yves is always holding ViVi’s hand and..!” Jiwoo was trying to defend herself. But failing.

“Jiwoo, look at us. What are we doing right now?”

“...Talking?” Jiwoo answered, confused.

“Not only that, but look at the table. We’re holding hands, aren’t we? And we’re also sharing a milkshake. Some outsiders may think we’re on a date, if they don’t know us. Don’t you think?”

Jiwoo stopped to think for a while and got shocked at the revelation. She nodded her head.

“Look, Chuu, I know that liking someone is hard. And when you’re anxious and creative, things can get out of hand. But please, try to look at the bigger picture, don’t let your paranoia win. I’m not saying there’s something wrong about Yves dating the two of them or something, but you’re missing the point. Yes, she always walks hand in hand with ViVi, but she also keeps hugging all of her other friends and caressing their hair and giving them flying kisses. She’s a tactile person. She’s very open about her affection. It’s her own way of behaving and I can guarantee that she’s not dating anyone at the moment. Really.”

Yeojin tried to speak in a soft, mature, voice. A kind of voice she must surely have copied from Haseul, after being on the receiving end of countless reassuring lectures from her older sister. It feels a bit weird for reversing the roles this time, but this only makes Yeojin feels more proud of herself. She has matured quite a bit. Haseul is going to be proud of her, too, once she tells her everything. If Jiwoo allows her to, obviously.

“I know this is silly, and that I shouldn’t be feeling this, but I’m actually so relieved. Today I realised just how deep I fell for her. Even more deeper than I have originally thought.” Jiwoo answered, with her head down. And Yeojin could sense how much it mattered, just by the serious and honest way her friend told her this.

Then Jiwoo got up and circled the table so she could hug her, and Yeojin hugged her back just as tightly. She felt closer to her friend after this conversation, and her love for her grew even more. She’s relieved that she for once did something right and was able to help her friend to get better.

“You’re the most amazing friend I could have asked for, Yeojin. I’m so glad I’ve met you.” Jiwoo told her into their hug, her voice all emotional. 

Yeojin herself was getting emotional too, and she won’t let this happen. At least not now, in public. Jiwoo will understand. So she broke their hug and looked her friend right in the eyes, and said with the most honest, determined and even a bit cheeky tone she could manage:

“Don’t worry, Wooguin. I’m gonna help you get your girl.” ****  
  


♡♡♡

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think about this chapter? Now all the girls were introduced, yay! I'm still going to develop them properly in the future, but I'm excited about being halfway through this fic already! 
> 
> Please comment your thoughts, I appreciate any feedback <3 <3
> 
> And you can always talk to me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/JiniusLab) too~~ 
> 
> I hope you all have a nice week!


	6. VI.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! After almost a month, I'm back again with the 6th chapter, yay!!
> 
> First of all, thank you a LOT for all the feedback!! I hold dearly every single comment and DMs you guys give me, thank you so much! I'm glad that you are enjoying the story so far <3
> 
> Life has been really crazy lately, so unfortunately I couldn't write sooner. But I hope you guys enjoy the chapter! It's a bit different from the other ones and I think you might like the surprise hehe <3

* * *

 

_“To be ourselves causes us to be exiled by many others,_

_and yet to comply with what others want,_

_causes us to be exiled from ourselves.”_

_(Clarissa Pinkola Estés)_

**VI.**

Sooyoung arrives home, still holding the big sunflower Jungeun had given her earlier, for their photoshoot with ViVi at the school’s garden. The huge flower and her heavy bag stands a bit in her way of unlocking the door, but after some struggles she finally managed to fit the key and get in her apartment.

 _Sighs_. And now she’s back again, ready to being just her and her loneliness, like she always ends up at the end of the day.

Living alone is a blessing. A privilege that not every 17 year old can have, and Sooyoung will forever be grateful to her dear grandmother for giving her this option, when things started to get very, very, _very_ bad at her parent’s house. Otherwise, Sooyoung had no idea where she would have been by now. Or rather, _how_ she would have been. Even after all this time, she still isn’t sure if she would have been strong enough to handle that shit for a few more years.

 _Nevermind this, Yves. The past should stay in its rightful time frame. It’s gone, it’s over now. Don’t think about it._ Sooyoung shakes her head, in order to make those uninvited thoughts go away.

A few steps in, Sooyoung threw her bag on a table and took out her cellphone, to connect it with her favorite gift that came with her beloved apartment: her bluetooth speakers, conveniently installed so that every room would have its own speaker, making the whole house light up with the music she chooses, whenever she wants to. And that’s exactly Sooyoung’s goal at the moment, as this ritual is her favorite part of her late afternoons, when she can have some quality time with herself.

She connected the device and then put her _“Yves”_ playlist to play, letting the sounds of her favorite songs make her company inside her big, empty apartment.

Yves loves to dance. And to sing. She loves every single way she can express herself, and let go of any inhibitions. And that’s exactly what she does, once she’s by herself at home: she keeps her songs playing while going through the tasks of the day, such as making dinner, cleaning up and studying. Because she’s _free_ . This is _her_ house, and from now on she will only live by her _own_ rules.

After having made some bad decisions, Yves had realised that that’s what truly matters: living her life by her life, not trying to mold herself into anybody’s vision or fantasy of her. And she can -- and will! -- do whatever the fuck she likes, because that’s why she’s in this world for. That’s who the new Ha Sooyoung aspires to be.

The world could be ending and Yves would still be dancing and being free, living her refreshed new days.

 

☆☆☆

 

Classes the next day went by uneventfully.

The same old subjects and teachers who seem to have nothing to say apart from scaring their students about college and college admission’s tests or how they should maintain the greatest scores, and be the perfect model students, otherwise they won’t have a future and later on they’ll regret it and have a miserable life. Meh. _Bullshit._ What use could you have if you only are a brainless robot, who blindly follows the rules of your school? Why can’t the teachers instead of only remind the students of the inevitable “life changing” tests, try and educate them so they can grow up to be a _good_ person? Why don’t adults ever teach their pupils how to… find happiness?

Yves grew up being taught that she should be _flawless._ She was taught good manners, she was taught how to be polite, how she has to keep getting better and better, and never let anyone take her front. All that people taught her when she was growing up was that she should always, always win. No matter what. _“You’re not at school to make friends, Sooyoung. You don’t have time for that. There are tests coming up.”_

She was taught that she should have good manners, but not to be polite, not to treat others well just for the sake of it. _You should be a good girl so that you can have important people on your side.You should befriend your teachers and the top students, they are going to get you places._

Connections, connections, fake smiles, small talk, study, study, study. Do this. Do that. Be yourself? What kind of bullshit is that? You need to _succeed._

Her family could have written a 1000 page rule book to teach Yves how she should live her life. But they never, not once, tried to teach her about happiness. Not even about _fun._ Yves had thought really deep about the subject, but she honestly could never recall a time where anyone tried to talk to her, and ask her what would make she happy. What are her passions. What does she want to do with her life. Not even if she had a dream. _Business are business, and you shouldn’t waste your time on petty things like that, Sooyoung. Waste your energy on what’s useful, don’t be naïve._

Yves have always loved learning, but she is tired of this fucked up school system. She’s tired of seeing her colleagues working like machines, because that’s the path their educators teach them and that’s the path they are brainwashed into believing that is what a successful life looks like. Yves doesn’t want to kill herself by studying non stop without a _real_ reason. She’s aware that most of those students keep studying without even having a _dream_ . They waste all this energy and time and their mental health just for some meaningless numbers and bought-out rankings. Most of them want desperately to get into college, but they have no idea what they want to major in. Because in this society, nobody _allows_ you to dream. Having lots of money, wearing high end brands and having expensive cars and big houses and rings seems to be the nation’s goal. But can this really be considered a dream?

“Yves? Are you in there? You seem lost in your head again.” Her friend, Haseul, suddenly asks, waving in front of her eyes to catch her attention.

“Shit, I didn’t even realise.” Yves shakes her head, trying to focus on the real world again. “I can’t stop thinking about what our teacher said today, all the bullshit that once we get into college miraculously all of our problems are going to be solved, but that we won’t get in if we keep being useless. I hate him. Doesn’t he get tired of making his students hopeless?” Yves could feel the increase of the anxiety everyone in the classroom felt while that pathetic man spoke to them. Their teacher’s words made them all feel terrible. Which is so unfair.

“Yves, Yves. Always the rebel one.” Jinsol suddenly appeared, carrying her lunch trail. “We all know he just likes to relieve his frustrations on us, because his personal life is a mess. Nevermind him, there's nothing you could do about this anyway.”

Jinsol sat at their table, next to Haseul, who was looking at her with judging eyes. “Hey, don’t be so mean! He surely isn’t the best teacher, but we need to be respectful.” But then, after looking at both sides to check if anyone was near, she continued in a low voice: “Not to mention that he’s doing a very kind thing to humanity by divorcing his third wife. That poor woman is getting out of a trap, I’m glad she’s free now.”

The three of them laughed loudly at that, and Haseul really had a point. At least someone was able to get free of this heartless man’s influence.

“But don’t you think he’s getting too far now? Today he basically told the class that if we aren’t trying hard enough to be the number one, we might as well just drop out. It’s insane!” Yves continued, still perplexed about this stupid teacher’s speech.

“I’m pretty sure I saw a student or two crying when they left the classroom. It was a mess.” Jinsol spoke, very serious. “All that the adults tell us is that having a stable job in the government is THE ULTIMATE dream. That we should study all day and take extra classes at night, be basically studying machines in order to fulfill this dream. But thankfully, I don’t have ears so I never listen to those absurds.” She ended her sentence by rolling her eyes.

“But whose dream is it? Surely it ain’t mine.” Haseul completed, matching her friends serious tone.

Yves had no idea her friends had so many deep thoughts about this subject that constantly enerves her. They don’t really speak about this kind of issue. And now she remembers why. The atmosphere at their table got very heavy, and the three girls spent a while just staring at each other, with a defeated façade. Talking about society’s issues are important, of course it is, but no one wants to keep being reminded of the unfairness and competitiveness that is the education system in their country. Not being ignorant of such matters can be a blessing and a curse.

After a while of eating in silence, with all three of them lost in their thoughts, thankfully the taciturn and heavy atmosphere was broken by a very loud and whiny Choi Yerim: “Oh fuck, why am I so stupid? I can’t believe I’ve forgotten the cherries I’ve bought at home, whyyyyy???”

Yerim, Chaewon and Jiwoo approached their table, all three of them carrying their trails. Yerim was making a cute whiny face, and Yves couldn’t help but laugh at her friend’s drama.

“You’re really living up to your nickname, aren’t you, Choerry?”

Her friend only answered her by scrunching her nose in annoyance. This cherry incident is probably upsetting her for real.

“Don’t mind her, Yves, she’s just upset because she’s been craving cherries for a while. And after she finally bought the fruits, yesterday she… got a bit too excited.” Chaewon said, hiding a shy laugh.

Surprisingly, as soon as Chaewon started to talk to Yves, Jiwoo quickly moved her head in Yves and Chaewon’s direction, staring at both of them with a shocked expression, as if it was too out of this world that Chaewon could be her friend. Jiwoo has always been a mystery to Yves, ever since they first met, when the girl suddenly got taken aback and ran away from her. And Yves was just about to ask her if there was something wrong, but at the same time Yerim chose to answer Chaewon’s remark:

“Hey! It’s not unusual to use a groupchat to share exciting news!” Yerim fought back, still whining.

“No, it’s not. But what’s unusual is that you literally only created the groupchat to talk about those fruits you bought! And you added in random people you hardly know! Poor Chaewon didn’t even have your number save, she just suddenly was added to a weird groupchat by strangers!” Jiwoo then added, laughing her ass off at Yerim, but never looking at Yves’ direction.

“Hey, hey, it’s really okay, though.” Chaewon calmly started, trying to hide her laugh. “At least the group brought me closer to you all, so I’m really glad for those cherries. Even though we couldn’t eat them together, like you had promised.”

Chaewon didn’t say her last sentence with malice, she was just stating facts, not trying to spoil the moment or anything. But, as soon as she got reminded about the failed cherries incident, Yerim started to feel bad again, and rested her head on Chaewon’s shoulder while fake crying.

Haseul and Jinsol appeared to be very entertained by the younger girls antics, as they kept laughing while watching as the scene unravels. But Yves’ attention was focused on one girl in particular, the one that always acts unexpectedly; the one that, by unknown reasons, can never speak a proper word to her.

Jiwoo is a very intriguing girl.

 

☆☆☆

 

Many times, Yves feels the need to stop herself, take a deep breath, and deeply think about how life is always in constant movement.

She often catches herself admiring the novelties a new day can bring and all of the beautiful possibilities being alive and in action unravels. _Isn’t it rare and beautiful to even exist?_ Yves breathes changes. She is constantly seeking the thrill of starting anew and living life the fullest way. If there is one thing that Yves would never allow herself to do is to _stop_.

But she’s always afraid. Fucking terrified, to be honest. Yeah, yeah, doing whatever she likes is fun and liberating, but Yves can’t help but feeling like she’s still trapped. Like her life isn’t truly hers, yet. What if that’s not who she really is? What if she’s just making the same mistakes she did a few years ago, when she wasn’t genuine because she wanted to fit in and change her ways?!

What if Yves just keeps being fake and fake and fake, just wearing disguises and never feeling anything real? Will she always feel this incomplete? Perhaps she’s just wrong herself, perhaps she was born damaged. Yves is aware that she doesn’t work like the others, that she’s… different, to put it in a nice way.

Under layers and layers of pretending that she’s okay and got everything under control, the only thing that Yves feels satisfied about her life is the amazing presence of her friends. She loves them all with her whole heart. And she couldn’t be more proud of their progress.

Haseul has always been an overachiever. Yves knows her since elementary school and, even though they haven’t always been best friends or anything, they weren’t so distant either. And Yves always admired Haseul’s determination and talents. That girl was _everywhere._ She helped at every school event, whatever the club it was from. She liked science, arts, maths, history, sports, she knew and participated in a little bit of everything. But what has always stood out for Yves wasn’t just her achievements at school, no. But actually how she always seemed so.. down to earth. Haseul always seemed comfortable in her own skin, in such a balanced way. This girl is amazing. She never judged anyone or acted like she was better, not at all. She always looked like a good person, who tries her best to make everyone feel accepted. And she’s only getting better as the years goes by. Haseul is unstoppable. And Yves feels honoured to be closer to her now and to watch her wings spread even more, like a beautiful bird getting ready to fly higher.

At their old school, Yves briefly met Heejin and Hyunjin, as well. She loves to watch people, always did, and when she was part of the cheering club, she and the girls used to practice nearby. At the time she wasn’t really friends with them, but they had some mutual acquaintances and at the times they went out together, Yves always watched the two girls being very awkward and helpless in the feelings they had for each other. They were really cute, like two oblivious kittens, scared and confused about what they felt, not knowing how to handle their feelings. Not only that, but Yves had a feeling that their confusion wasn’t just because of their young age, but she would say that the girls were also facing some internal changes, too. Yves remembers clearly how the two seemed more free and relaxed once they started to go out and date. It took them a long time of pining and, as an outsider, Yves herself couldn’t stand that everlasting tension anymore. She can’t even imagine how terrible it must have been, living in their own skin all of the drama. But now, thankfully, the girls seem to be free, without any inhibitions, and the happiest they could be. It’s refreshing to see. Yves feels like a proud mom, that has watched her precious daughters grow into two beautiful and independent and sure of themselves women. Figuratively speaking, of course. The love birds aren’t related in anyway. At all.

Yves still doesn’t know Jinsol, Jungeun, Chaewon and Yerim very well, but she’s grateful for them, too. They are all wonderful people, that are pursuing what they love, determinately. Yves wishes she had their strength one year ago, when she was their age. She has a lot to learn from them.

ViVi, from Yves’ eyes, is fantastic. She’s truly brave and inspirational. She did one of the most badass things Yves could imagine: moved out, alone and young, to another fucking COUNTRY, which she hardly could speak the language of. This shit is awesome. And Yves still remembers when they first met, because of the job assigned to her, that she had to welcome the foreign students of her school. At the beginning, she was very quiet and shy, amazed and confused about everything she saw, simultaneously. Yves had to take her under her wing. ViVi was not only cool and nice, but she also reminded her of… bravery. Of not being scared and having strength to start anew. Even now, almost a year later, Yves still feels the need to love and protect her friend. Not because the girl can’t do it herself, but because Yves cares deeply about her. Because of ViVi, Yves got close to Haseul again, and this changed everything. ViVi is always a bearer of good news. Just her precious presence lights up any room.

And there was Yeojin as well. Just like her other friends, she’s constantly making progress and evolving. Until very recently, Yves was pretty sure that Yeojin hated her. Or at least, disliked her deeply. The younger girl used to be all suspicious eyes and ambiguous remarks whenever Yves was around, and it was understandable. Yves can’t judge her for not liking her. She wouldn’t like herself, either, if she was in someone else’s skin. Not after what she had done. Yeojin had all the reasons in the world not to trust her, and Yves respected that. And always tried not to take things to heart.

But… It seemed like Yeojin had changed her mind about her? It’s been a few months since she last been hostile to her, or treated her with coldness and silence. They can have proper conversations now. And just a few days ago the girl unexpectedly asked her some random questions about herself, as a strange way of making conversation. Yves isn’t really sure how the questions of “What’s your favorite color?”, “Do you have a favorite group?”, “What do you think about cute penguins?”, “Do you prefer long or brief relationships?” and a huge list of similar interrogations will make them become closer friends, but if that’s Yeojin’s approach then she won’t complain. It was actually really fun to answer her quirky questions.

Yeojin has been changing a lot and Yves is pretty sure she knows a big reason for that to be happening. And this reason has a name: Kim Jiwoo. Since this girl appeared in her life and the two become inseparable, Yeojin has been softening up. And she seems a lot more happy, too. She used to always be alone, obsessing with her sister’s well-being. Now it’s almost like she learned how to have fun instead of always being paranoid and fighting random people.

Jiwoo actually makes everyone she gets closer to more brighter, if what Yves observed was right. Beautiful, cute, cheerful Jiwoo. Very, very endearingly strange Jiwoo. She seems to be very special. Perhaps that’s why she seems to hate Yves. Special people tend to identify worthless individuals. Maybe it’s for the best that Jiwoo does everything to avoid her. Even though Yves feels a strong pull towards Jiwoo, there’s a reason the other girl doesn’t ever speak to her. Yves should learn how to control her impulses, anyway. Nothing good can come out of trying to approach someone who clearly shows she’s uncomfortable near you, whatever are their reasons to.

It seems like all of her friends are improving themselves and going places, while Yves is still stuck in the same place. She tries to get better, but Yves is afraid that she’ll never get to erase her wrong thoughts and tendencies. She fears she’ll never truly be a new version of herself. Of course she’s fucking proud of all of her friend’s progress, but she would like to make some progress herself, too.

Yves doesn’t want to keep looking at herself in the mirror and not knowing who the person staring at her is. Is she a farce?

 

☆☆☆

 

After practising for 2 hours or so, Yves was finally feeling satisfied with herself.

Dancing had always been her passion, even though she spent a big and sad part of her life without being allowed to let herself fall in love with this art. Music has always been Sooyoung’s paradise, a powerful way to escape reality. And dancing just makes her favorite songs even more wholesome.

Despite not having any dancing clubs at her school, she had made a deal with a teacher and, at some afternoons, she’s allowed to sneak in the dancing studio of the school. Which is a blessing, seeing as she doesn’t have to be shy and can dance as much as she wants, however she likes. Yves couldn’t be luckier.

Yves is usually by herself, since her dancing time is something she doesn’t want to share just yet. Not that she’s afraid of her friends knowing or anything but, as much as she loves them dearly, she’s aware that once they know about this big classroom she has permission to stay in some afternoons, they wouldn’t really leave her alone. Besides, she likes the mystery. People often ask her where the hell she stays after classes. _Oh well, you all will never know. Mwahahah._

Sometime after resting from the exercise, she collected all of her things and left the classroom, locking it up. But just as she was reaching the end of the corridor and was about to take the stairs, she saw that someone was sat at the first step, looking on the opposite direction and using her bag as a pillow. Yves was taken aback. Nobody should know about this place.

“...Jiwoo?” Yves asked in a careful voice, afraid that the girl in front of her isn’t really there, that she’s nothing but a mirage.

The girl jumped as she heard her name, then turned around and looked Yves in the eye, without speaking anything. Yves realised that this was the first time the two of them were alone together, not to mention the first time the younger girl is actually _looking at her_ instead of avoiding her glance. This unexpected change made Yves feel nervous and her heart started to beat a lot faster, too. _What the hell is going on?_

After some time of awkward silence and nervousness from both of the girls, Jiwoo took a deep breath and started to speak, bravely: “Hi, Yves. Can I talk to you?”

“Yes, you can. But first tell me: how did you find this place? Were you following me?” Yves had no idea what to expect. She actually had no idea of anything that was going on. She needed answers. Didn’t Jiwoo hate her? Why does she suddenly want to talk to her?

“Oh shit-- No, I wasn’t following you! Not this time, at least.. I mean!! No, no, of course not!” Jiwoo was stumbling upon her words and laughing nervously. “One of this days I accidentally saw you get into this building and.. Ok ok, I mean, if you look at things this way, you _could_ say I followed you to see what you were doing but!!!! I was just curious because you always disappear every afternoon and then reappeared out of nowhere? I had a theory that you had a _tardis_ or something and.. Fuck, I’m rambling. What I’m trying to say is that I _might_ have followed you inside the building but I never got as far as the classroom you use, I would never _ever_ want to intrude your privacy but--”

“Hey hey, Jiwoo. Breathe. It’s ok, I understood. You were following me but without bad intentions. I got it.” Yves felt the need to intrude the other girl. She was all flushed and hurrying to justify herself, so much that she didn’t even take time to breathe between her words. It was all a bit extra but very endearing.

“ _Following_ is such a strong wor--” Jiwoo started, but ended her sentence as soon as she saw Yves’ impatient glance. “Ok, I was _kinda_ following you. You won.” She sighed.

“Of course I won.” Yves opened a triumphant smile. “Now tell me, what do you want to talk about? You’re aware that we never really held a conversation before, right?”

“Yeah.. It’s actually about this that I want to talk to you. Just wait a minute, please.” Jiwoo then opened her bag and searched for something that was inside of it. But once she found it, Yves couldn’t really see what it was because the girl quickly hid the item behind her back. “I… I want to apologize. For everything. For stupidly running away the first time we met and for ignoring you all of those months. I know I acted like a jerk and I swear it wasn’t on purpose. And, most importantly, it wasn’t at all personal. Really. AT ALL. There’s nothing wrong with you and I’m really, genuinely sorry if I ever made you believe that I didn't like you. This couldn’t be more far from the truth.”

Jiwoo said everything at once, speaking very fast. Occasionally she made eye contact with Yves, but it didn’t last more than a second. However, Yves could understand her perfectly so it was okay. And she was fucking relieved, too. Jiwoo took a great weight out of her shoulders by coming clean.

“I was so certain you actually hated me. Because you were so smiley and cuddly with the other girls, but once I got into the room you always got so tense and quiet.” If Jiwoo was being honest, then Yves wanted to be honest too. The girl seriously played with her insecurities, even though it seemed like it wasn’t on purpose.

“I apologize for my behaviour. I’m sorry, Yves, not in a million years I would want to do something that could hurt you. I… I thought I was insignificant. That my behaviour wouldn’t have consequences, that you wouldn’t mind. But now I realise how wrong I was, and I want to make up for it. Please, Yves, would you give me another chance? Can we start all over and get to know each other the right way?”

With that, she finally showed the item she hid behind her back earlier. Which is… An... Apple? A green one, nonetheless. _Of course. Jiwoo is not sinful like you, to offer a red apple, Yves. Don't be silly._ But still... It's an apple after all. And Yves was taken by surprise.

As she ended her proposition, Jiwoo bowed and offered the apple to Yves. Her tone was very serious and this time she spoke the words slower and with care, so that Yves would be able to understand her well. Jiwoo was wearing a high ponytail, tied in a big bow band. And because she was bowing, the ponytail was falling on her face, and it only made her look even more adorable to Yves’ eyes. She was not only cute, but honest as well. And those are two traits Yves are weak for. So she smiled at the girl and accepted the apple.

“You don’t need to bow, silly. Just the apology would be enough. But I loved the apple, it’s my favorite fruit. Thank you.”

“I know that.” Jiwoo said, not really paying attention to her words. She was smiling a lot, excited that Yves accepted her gift. Her smile was contagious.

"Apology accepted, ChuuChuu.” Yves sent the girl a cheeky smile, that made her blush. _Fuck, this girl is going to be the death of me._ Then she continued: “But you still owe me one, though. And I don't let things go so easily." She then winked on poor Jiwoo’s direction and took a bite from the apple, while maintaining eye contact with the girl.

Yves wasn’t one for waiting, so after that she turned around and went down the stairs to leave. She couldn’t control her smile, though. She still couldn’t believe that this scene had actually happened and that Jiwoo had actually apologized, after months of nonsense. Who does that?

Jiwoo is a very peculiar girl. And Yves has to admit that she’s getting drawn by that.

Quite a lot.

 

☆☆☆

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still not sure of how I feel about this chapter. There are some parts that I really enjoyed but others that I thought were too long and boring >_< I wanted to write many details so you guys could get to know Yves a bit better, since this is her pov, so this chapter was more of an introduction. 
> 
> The next one is going to be a lot more dynamic and you'll finally get to see our beautiful Chuuves interacting more!! Yay!
> 
> I would love to hear your thoughts about the story!
> 
> Thank you SO MUCH for reading, I love you all <3 <3 <3


	7. VII.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, my beautiful angels~~~~ 
> 
> Yeah, it's been a bit more than 2 months since the last update.. I'm aware that I'm a very chaotic writer and I'm so sorry for keeping you guys waiting :( 
> 
> On the meantime I read all of your wonderful comments and they all gave me so much strength, honestly, any feedback from you guys is deeply appreciated and they always make my day. Thank you so much for all the love, it makes me the happiest to know that some people like this fic! <3 <3 <3
> 
> Well, first of all, I took a lot to write not only because of real life and my mental health, but also because I had to change some things on my plans... As I said before, I started writing this fic having all of the 10 chapters carefully planned. But with Olivia being introduced, I wanted to fit her into the story! And I'm happy with what I created, but it was a challenge to rethink and rewrite somethings. And that's one of the reasons why I took so long... Anyways!
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter, it's the longest so far! I hope it's worth the wait <3
> 
> ps: the texts in _italic_ are flashbacks!
> 
> pps: there's a little special detail on this chapter that I'm very happy to finally put together! Will you guys find out what it is? Huhuhu~~~~ 
> 
> <3

_ “Let’s stare at each other and fall in love. _

_ Amor, amor. Es lo que quiero. So, ven y dame. _

_ Ven y dame.” _

_ ([Daniela Andrade](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWC4bJQy0mc)) _

 

**VII.**

The next day, Yves goes to wait for Jiwoo at her classroom door, some time before their classes started. The other girl still haven’t arrived, but Yves was determined. When Yves had told Jiwoo that the girl “still owed her one”, she wasn’t kidding. Once Yves set her mind to a goal, she doesn’t rest until she gets it. And she really wants to get closer to Jiwoo, now that she knows she’s not unwelcomed. She wants to make up for all the lost time.

Yves isn’t exactly sure  _ why _ , but she had spent the whole night thinking about the girl and their peculiar exchange the day before. So, after many hours without managing to fall asleep, she realized she had to do  _ something _ about it, had to see her as soon as possible, otherwise her head wouldn’t stop spinning. She needed a plan. And she was going to put it into action as soon as she arrived at their school.

Because she’s a tease and a little shit, while she was waiting for Jiwoo to arrive, Yves had the idea of putting her hair up in a bun, just to spite the other girl. With a smirk, Yves carefully crafted a nice plan for once the cutie arrives. 

And that happened right away, for Yves’ sake.

“Here, unnie, an apple to make up for my weird behaviour the last few months!” Yves spoke in a forced  _ aegyo _ voice, while stretching her hand to offer Jiwoo an apple, startling the girl. Jiwoo jumped and released a little scream of surprise and that only made Yves’ smirk grow even more.

“Hey! That’s not how my voice sounds like!” Jiwoo fought back after recomposing herself, looking exasperated. “And I didn’t call you  _ unnie _ !”

“But I bet you wanted to.” Yves replied, winking at her.

Jiwoo spent some time in silence, almost like she was…  _ shocked _ , looking at Yves direction. Yves supposed that her wink took the younger girl by surprise and made her grow timid. She took a note of that. 

But the girl soon went back to her senses and managed to retort in a playful way, after finally accepting the fruit: “And you’re a terrible impersonator, Yves! The apple I gave you was green.”

“What can I say? Red apples are superior.” Yves shrugged.

Jiwoo laughed back at her, but then her mood changed and she talked in a serious tone: “And thank you for this apple, by the way. I woke up late so I didn’t have time to eat breakfast.” Then she sent a small smile in Yves’ direction.

“You couldn’t sleep?”

“Yeah.. My head was full of thoughts and it wouldn’t shut up… But I’m used to this, though, so it’s not a big deal.” Jiwoo ended the sentence with a forced laugh, trying to light up the mood.

“I get it.” Yves said, truthfully. “I couldn’t sleep well either...”

A beat passes and both girls were looking at each other in embarrassment, not knowing what to say. Until the bell conveniently rang, indicating their classes were about to start.

“I guess I should go to my classroom now.. See you around?” Yves managed to say, a bit awkward.

“Yes, of course! We’ll bump into each other sometime, absolutely.” Jiwoo answered, in a rush and just as awkwardly. Not knowing how to finish her sentence, Jiwoo then sent two finger guns in Yves’ direction, laughing nervously. 

The girl seemed to have regretted the action as soon as she did it, but Yves just laughed out loud and repeated the gesture in Jiwoo’s direction, finding everything the girl did adorable.

“You’re really one of a kind, Jiwoo.” Yves told her fondly, before turning around and leaving.

If anybody pointed it out, she would  _ blatantly _ deny it. But thanks to Jiwoo and their small conversation early in the morning, Yves watched all of her classes that day with a big smile plastered on her face.

 

☆☆☆

 

Without planning it or even realising, both of them meeting before their classes started soon became a habit of theirs. Jiwoo and Yves would meet everyday early in the morning, even as inconvenient as that hour was for two girls who often couldn’t sleep. 

It all began with the apple Yves mockingly gave Jiwoo, but then it turned into a competition of sorts. The next day Jiwoo met her at her classroom door, just to copy what Yves had made the day before, but instead of an apple, she was carrying two cups of hot chocolate. 

_ (“Boo!” Jiwoo startled Yves, the next day, as a payback. _

_ Yves is a bit less extra than Jiwoo, not even half as extroverted as the other girl. Not to mention that she’s a whole lot classier, too, always trying to keep her composure. So she didn’t let her shock be displayed. Yves tried very hard to play it cool, like Jiwoo didn’t scare her while she was unguarded and still sleepy. _

_ But of course Jiwoo wouldn’t let it go easily. “I know I scared you, you can’t fool me!” She laughed, looking at Yves with a Sherlock Holmes-esque façade. Both of them laughed. Jiwoo is really something else. _

_ “I’m always ready, you can’t scare me, Chuu.” Yves would never admit defeat. _

_ But Jiwoo is not one to give up easily. “Well.. I brought two cups of hot cocoa with me, but I guess only easily scared people can drink them. Too bad you’re not one of them, Yves. They smell delicious.” _

_ Yves couldn’t believe the girl would play this dirty. The drinks really smelled delicious.  _

_ “And it’s such a cold day!!” Jiwoo continued with a theatrical voice, once she realised Yves wasn’t going to answer her. _

_Well.. It_ ** _is_** _a very, very cold day, indeed. But Yves refuses to fall on such a cheap trick._

_ Seeing that Yves wasn’t buying her bullshit, Jiwoo then opened the lid of one of the cups and smelled it very dramatically, just to prove her point. Yves let out a small laugh, not believing this girl was such a dork. She had to fight back. _

_ Yves then got closer to Jiwoo, much closer than she had been before, and whispered a small “boo”, looking directly at Jiwoo’s eyes. And, as she expected, the younger girl froze at her spot, not even blinking.  _

_ “Too bad not even you are easily scared, Jiwoo. So I guess you can’t drink this either.” Yves said playfully, before sneakily taking the other cup of hot chocolate Jiwoo was carrying. _

_ Yves then turned around and got inside her classroom, not failing to notice that Jiwoo was still frozen, gaping in the same spot Yves had left her.)  _

The day after that, to compensate, Yves greeted the girl with some  _ croissants _ . And next Jiwoo arrived with some cupcakes.

Soon they agreed that it would be easier to just meet at a Café before school, so they could eat in peace and have more time to chat and maintain their daily banter. 

And that’s the story of how Yves and Jiwoo started to have breakfast together every single school day.

They always met early, too early in the morning. But if any of them cared, they didn't show. They tried a few places before Yves found a small hipster Café, not too far from their school but also not too close, in case other students frequented the place as well. They’ve bumped into a few of them before and none of the girls had liked it. They weren’t ready for intruders on their small gatherings.

_ “It’s not like we’re keeping our friendship a secret, but people at our school always gossip so much..” Jiwoo said one day, after taking a bite of Yves’ apple pie. “Nice choice, by the way. Next time I’m surely gonna pick this one!”  _

_ “Yeah, I don’t like this attention either, it feels like we’re always being monitored by everyone, like they are trying to intimidate us or telling us how to behave. I prefer this place, we’re too cool to be mainstream anyways.” Then Yves paused. “Hey, Jiwoo, why isn’t your frappuccino decafed? I thought you hated coffee.”  _

_ They usually share their drinks so it’s not a big deal for Yves to drink whatever Jiwoo decided to choose, after taking too much time undecided by all of the choices available. Libras will be libras at the end of the day, Yves constantly thinks.  _

_ But Yves grew to like Jiwoo’s decisions. They may take a while to be made but they are always unexpected and really cool. Once Jiwoo ordered a watermelon and pineapple juice, for example. And it tasted amazing, even as weird as this combination was. That was the day that Yves decided to never question Jiwoo’s quirky decisions and to just trust on her exquisite taste. _

_ “Well.. They got my order wrong and I didn’t want to disturb the barista to make me another one. I know you like coffee so it’s not a big deal.” Jiwoo answered timidly. _

_ “Chuu.. We’ve talked about this already. If they get your order wrong, it’s your right as a customer to ask for another one. It wouldn’t disturb anyone, this is their job. What if you were allergic to coffee? You could be dead by now.” Yves tried to say in a warm way, to make Jiwoo understand. She always thinks too much about what others might think or feel. This isn’t right. She shouldn’t put herself on the second place and keep herself from what she truly wants to do. _

_ “But… You already drank half of it, it’s too late now to ask for another one. I promise that if this happens again I won’t hesitate, ok? Really. Just let it go. And who in the world is allergic to coffee? Is this even possible?” Jiwoo was beginning to get uncomfortable, so she tried to hide it by laughing at her own words. Maybe this was a big deal for her, even though Yves couldn’t really understand how simply asking for another drink could be a bother.  _

_ Yves didn’t want to make her feel even more bad about herself, though. Their mornings are supposed to be about starting their day well, about banter and laughs and companionship, not about guilt or judgements. Everyone has their internal battles. Yves being able to sympathize with it or not has nothing to do with Jiwoo’s feels. So she changed subjects, like her friend wanted. _

_ (Although… When Jiwoo went to the restroom before they left the Café to go to school, Yves used the chance to go and complain about the misunderstood, and the barista made her another drink without asking twice. He apologized a lot, not wanting to lose their faithful clients. The girls had been coming to this place for a couple of weeks now. _

_ Jiwoo got very excited once Yves gave her the decaffeinated drink and even hugged her friend to thank her. She knew the other girl was downplaying how much she would like to have drank it earlier. Once Jiwoo decides on something, she is certain she wants it.  _

_ And if it was up to Yves, Jiwoo would always get everything she ever desired.)  _

All of their mornings are special, because at that time of the day, it’s only  _ them _ . 

They talk to each other at school sometimes, of course, but when they are with the other girls, things are a bit different and it’s like they never have the opportunity to be by themselves.

During their early mornings together, they always talk about lots of random things. Jiwoo is bright even after she had just woken up, and her mood gives Yves energy, even though she had never been a morning person. Yves feels at ease whenever she’s near Jiwoo. 

She doesn’t think it’s very noticeable, but since she got closer to Jiwoo, Yves feels like a changed person. The differences on the outside are probably very subtle, but on the inside Yves feels very energized and ready to face anything after meeting with Jiwoo. 

That quirky girl makes Yves feel brighter and like her days are worthier.

 

☆☆☆

 

“You seem different, Yves.”  

_ Oh, no. _

“What do you mean, Vivi? I’m just the same old Yves, your annoying best friend.” 

_ Shit.  _ Yves is scared of what her friend might answer. _ Could it be that she noticed something about… _ ?

“No, you’re not. You started to arrive so bubbly at school. And you’re more talkative too..” Vivi continued, carefully choosing her words. “A few months ago you used to always arrive so grumpy, nobody could even get a cheerful word from you on the first periods. But now…”

“I’m not that grumpy, stop exaggerating,  _ Kahei _ . I’ve always been a very sweet and innocent and lovely girl, I can’t believe it took you two years to notice.” Yves tried to put her most charming face, she even blinked her eyes innocently, to prove her point.

And obviously, Vivi wasn’t buying any of it, and she let it very clear with her “ _ stop with your bullshit, Yves” _ face. This girl has a very sharp mind and she’s always very honest, despite being the sweetest girl in the whole universe. That’s why she and Yves get on like a house on fire. Her best friend couldn’t be anything less than a playful and genuine sagittarius. Yves loves her friend to death. 

“I remember very clearly that last year you started a heated debate over  _ polynomials  _ with our teacher just because you woke up moody.” 

Yeah, Yves takes it back. She actually hates Vivi and wishes she could return to Taiwan as soon as possible. She’s the worst best friend in the world, why would she remember that? Not to mention that Yves wasn’t in a bad mood, she was very right that day. That mathematical graphic looked completely stupid. Numbers are stupid. She just wanted a more fun class.

“That teacher had it coming, seriously. Who in their right mind puts a boring algebra class on the first period? I made the class a favor by questioning all of those variables that aren’t meant to be solved. What’s the use of it, then? Just to create more equations and put up some graphics not meant to find the incognita? Cut me some slack.” Yves rolled her eyes. Just by thinking of maths made her head ache. Thankfully she’s free of this horror now. 

Vivi looked at her friend seriously but then she bursted into laugh, soon joined by Yves. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever had that much fun in an algebra class before. That was such a wonderful day.” Vivi said after a while of laughter, drying some tears from her eyes. 

Yves smiled to herself. 

_ The mission to distract Vivi was completed successfully. _

 

☆☆☆

 

Vivi might have dropped the subject but, for Yves’ despair, apparently her internal changes  _ were _ very obvious on the outside. 

“What has gotten into you lately?” Haseul asked her that same day, on the interval of the relay team’s practice. “I’m used to seeing you smile a lot, but it usually has to do with some cheeky remarks you make or something like that. But now……. You are weirdly smiling at anything and anywhere. You seem to be talking a lot more too, instead of only observing the people around you.”

The thing is, after Vivi, Haseul wasn’t the only one to question her behaviour lately. Jungeun and Yerim did the same and, albeit more discreetly, even  _ Chaewon, _ the most quiet and secretive person on their group, that tiny, tiny loveable cute fairy, had sent her a knowing glance, as if she had noticed  _ something _ about Yves. 

Yves hates this. She had always been a very private person when it came to her feelings. Surely she’s not wearing her heart on her sleeve. That’s so unrealistic. Her friends are just conspirators, that’s all. 

“Don’t you have some training to do, Haseul? If you get this distracted by someone else’s life the team won’t get good results, just saying.”

“We won all of the races so far.” Haseul answered, incredulous. “The final is just around the corner.”

_ Fuck. Yeah, she’s right. Yves and the other girls had even went to all of the games at home and cheered for them. Oops. _

She was just about to reply when she got distracted by some random sound Jiwoo let out nearby. She was photographing Heejin and Hyunjin on their break, and if Yves heard it right, she kept giving them instructions such as “Yeah, now make an athletic pose! Nice, now try to look like the most badass lesbian power couple of the relay race history! Look at the camera like you own this championship!”. But Yves could be mistaken, though. It’s not like Chuu to give those random and weird instructions for her pictures.  _ Obviously not. _ Ha. Yves smiled a bit to herself.

“Sometimes I think that she takes more pictures of you than of the team.” Haseul said, out of nowhere.

“Who?”

“Don’t play silly. You know who I’m talking about. And coincidentally, she appears to be a lot happier later, too.” Haseul sent her a delicate smile. She was looking at Yves with a warm expression, one that showed how happy she was because of their happiness, and how much she supports whatever is going on. But Yves wasn’t ready for such a look coming from her.

Yves has no idea why she’s avoiding this subject so much. It’s not like her to run away from things. But, for some unknown reason, for now at least, all she wants is to keep this.. thing?.. she has with Jiwoo private. She’s not ready to talk about it, or even to  _ deal  _ with it. It’s not the time yet.

“And when is the last competition anyways? Where is it going to be?”

So she did what she thought was right and didn’t take the bait. 

After all, diverting the attention from things she doesn’t want to talk about is what Yves does best.

 

☆☆☆

 

Maybe it was because their finals were approaching and nobody was able to rest properly, or maybe it was because their friendship had grown stronger, but the early meetings at their Café took another route after a while.

Instead of meeting just to eat in peace and enjoy some good banter, somehow just laughing and having some lightheaded conversations wasn’t enough for them anymore.

It all started on a cold, rainy day.

“Sometimes I feel like just giving up everything and running away without a destiny.” Yves said in a sigh, leaning on her textbook. She had a test in an hour or so, and reviewing is essential.

Everyone was going mad those last few days.

Jiwoo let her cellphone and camera aside and replaced them with her textbooks, filled with cute post-its of the most important subjects. She has her head on the clouds, like usual, but this time is because of something more important. Reviewing. Reviewing. Always reviewing. That morning she even bumped into the door because she couldn’t take her eyes off her notes. And that wasn’t even the first time.

Their friends even created a little study group. They met at the library after their club activities on the afternoon to try and learn something together. They were all so desperate that they  _ actually _ studied, refusing to drift their focus away from the subjects they needed to know by heart. High school is difficult, those years are full of confusion and despair. But being a high school student in South Korea was even more mad. 

“I swear to God that if I have to memorize any more of those physics equations I’m gonna actually run away with you.” Jiwoo answered, in a stressed voice Yves had never heard before. A few minutes later, the girl unexpectedly buffed and closed her textbook in frustration. “Actually, count me in. Let’s elope. Do you prefer sunny or cold places?” 

Too tired to keep studying, Yves let go of her notes as well. Then she and Chuu continued to discuss hypothetical places they would like to run away to. Together. 

That particular day was the first time the girls had a more serious conversation, without laughing or making jokes at every 5 minutes. Even though the subject was mainly dreams and fantasies, both of them were too tired to try and be funny, or to keep a light mood. They just talked while enjoying their hot drinks in their cozy and favorite Café, a place that already feels like home to them. The girls talked and talked, simply letting their imagination and honesty flow through their spoken words.

Because it was a rainy day, Yves and Chuu shared an umbrella on their way to school. 

After a while, the stress and anxiety from the upcoming tests were long lost on the back of their minds. And if they were being honest, at that moment, nothing else in the world mattered but the proximity sharing an umbrella provided. 

And nobody had to know that they spent the entire itinerary with their hands interlaced, by holding the handle of the umbrella at the same time. Nobody had to know that this move was completely deliberate, from both parts. 

Just like whatever happens every morning, it was their own little secret. A little secret not so secretive, that kept going for days and days. 

After that rainy morning, they kind of made a non spoken agreement of always being honest with each other. No lies or judgements were allowed. Their conversations will always be a safe space, that was their deal.

It started with their big dreams. Dreams of running away, dreams of freedom, dreams of happiness and being loved. Then it went from the unfair society to abusive parents and hard times at school. They talked about how much they want to embrace and love the world, but many times it was like the feeling wasn’t reciprocal. The world is a beautiful place, filled with beautiful people and small happiness ready to be found. Love ready to be given. But why does it seem like is never easy? Why does it seem like such a burden to give back? Both of the girls often talked about being inadequate and very much lost, just like any younger person might feel.

The cold and rainy days were the best and the most expected to Yves and Chuu.

Because when it was cold, one of them could pretend to have forgotten their gloves so the other would so very thoughtfully offer to hold their hand, so they won’t freeze to death on the way to school. And on the rainy days they could always hold the umbrella together with their fingers laced together, as an excuse to share their warmth. There were always excuses and both of the girls were aware of their own bullshit. With the passing of time, both of them were very sure of what they were hiding from themselves and from each other.

Their Café and each other’s company was a safe space for them, an environment of sincerity. But still, their biggest truth remained untold, even as obvious as it was. 

 

☆☆☆

 

“You have such big and intense eyes.” Yves let out one day, too early in the morning to think straight. Jiwoo had a habit of staring at people for a long time, and that only made her beautiful, big, dreamy brown eyes more bright. And outstanding. “I love the way you always get lost and immersed while watching the world.” 

“I just like watching you.” Jiwoo replied casually. Perhaps it was too early in the morning for her too, and her brain to mouth filter wasn’t in its best condition either. Jiwoo seemed honest, if not a bit tired.

Just as Yves was about to retort, to answer something,  _ anything _ , Jiwoo continued: “You make it worthy to get out of bed each morning, even at this inhuman hour. Just the fact that I’m lucky enough to see you as one of the first things in the morning makes all the difference. I’m sorry if I seem weird, I just really can’t stop watching you. Sometimes I feel like I’m the moon spinning around the earth. And the earth is you, Yves.” 

Yves smiled a bit to herself, very shy. This girl is going to be the death of her, she’s more certain about it each day. 

She then decided to take the attention off herself.

“I have to say that I’ve noticed that you sneakily take quite a few pictures of me during the girls’ practice. Even though your job is to capture  _ them _ and their  _ training _ , not plain old me.” 

Even after what she had said earlier, this was the first thing that made Jiwoo get shy that morning. She reacted to Yves’ words by dramatically resting her head on the table, in order to hide her face. “Nooo, did you notice it? I tried to be as low-key as possible!”

“You’re not as discreet as you think you are, Chuu. Pay attention.” Yves laughed in a playful way.

Seeing as the girl was not going to answer her, too ashamed to reply back, Yves then picked up her mug of hot chocolate, that was now in the perfect temperature for her to drink it without burning her tongue. She closed her eyes and let the steam and the chocolate and marshmallow smell fill up her face. This is one of her favorite sensations in the world, and a daily morning ritual.

“Why are you making things harder for me? This is unfair!” Jiwoo whined suddenly, her head still rested on the table, but now inclined to watch Yves. To watch a  _ confused _ Yves, actually, because the other girl couldn’t comprehend what all the fuss was about that time.

“I don’t get it. Why do you think I’m making things harder for you? Sometimes I even pose for your pictures, even without looking at the camera. I’m trying to help you, Jiwoo.” Yves replied lightly, winking at the end. She concluded that Jiwoo was still talking about her paparazzi shots. “If you’re so picky you should’ve just asked me for the pictures, you fool.”

Jiwoo buffed and hid her face once again. With her face covered, she mumbled something incomprehensible. But Yves couldn't hear a thing, so she tried once again, louder this time.

“What I’m trying to say is that you kill me everytime you taste your coffee or hot chocolate or tea or whatever hot drink you choose. You look like a goddess savouring the finest grains or the finest beverage celestial beings poured on earth, made just for you. Each morning is a sacrifice to contain myself from crying with this view.” 

Yves laughed at that. Hard. And for a long time. If she was being honest, the laugh was just to hide how much she blushed and got shy at the other girl’s words. And also because of her  _ interesting _ description to express herself. But Yves would never let Jiwoo see her that way.

“And here is that bravery from before! I’m glad you’re back, Jiwoo. I like it when you’re this honest. You have a fascinating mind.” Yves aimed to make the girl blush as well, as a revenge for making her own cheeks rosy. 

But Jiwoo didn’t react at all after her compliment. 

It’s like Yves’ words -- even as positive or flirty as they can be -- never penetrate Jiwoo’s skin. The other girl is so unaware of her environment that she fails to notice even compliments or anything nice that others say about her. It’s weird and Yves doesn’t know why she behaves this way. But this only makes her more determined to be creative and to find other ways of making her realise the message she’s trying to send across. 

So she took her hand, to try and make Jiwoo look her in the eye, something she had been avoiding a lot lately.

“I like watching you too, Jiwoo. There’s something about you that always makes you get my full attention. Even before, when I was sure you hated me. You’re a really, really,  _ really _ exquisite girl. And that only makes you more special and unique to me.” Yves then squeezed the other girl’s hand, ready to let go after telling her this truth. 

But, as if she previewed Yves was going to release her hand, Jiwoo placed her free hand above Yves’, and let out a small, quiet and shy “Please, don't” to stop her from letting go. And of course Yves complied, how could she not? Deep down, she wasn't ready to stop touching Jiwoo either.

Jiwoo didn't answer her, and she also didn't seem to accept Yves’ words, because of the impenetrable wall she surrounds herself with. Jiwoo may seem like an open book, like an extroverted girl ready to be approached and entertained, once she's comfortable. But she has this mysterious air around herself too. Her bubbly personality is not enough to hide her distant and doubtful interior, one that is always trying to protect herself from external forces, one that doesn't let Jiwoo believe the nice things people tell about her. Yves is more confused and intrigued than ever, but she refused to let go of her hand. So the two girls stayed like this for a long time, with their hands intertwined and finishing the rest of their breakfast, without saying any more words to each other, just caressing their fingers silently.

There was no way of Yves being able to notice how fast Jiwoo’s heart was beating, or how much the girl was trying to stop herself from shaking so much. Yves had no idea that Jiwoo’s tight grip on her hand was because the girl needed an anchor to help her deal with the flood of anxious feelings that filled her up after this confession. Jiwoo was having a hard time to even  _ breathe _ , but Yves didn’t know. How could she?

Yves wishes she could have noticed those tiny details back then.

 

☆☆☆

 

“What the fuck did you do?” An angry Yeojin cornered Yves, looking for answers. 

Yeojin was so out of her mind that she didn’t even wait for her sister’s practice to end. She went looking for Yves as soon as she arrived at school that afternoon. And she found her, after some time, alone in a recluse garden. So she wasted no time and got down to business, to find out what the fuck was going on.

“Hey, what’s wrong with you? What are you doing?” Yves tried to step away from the smaller girl, fearing what she might do. Why is she so angry? Why is she trying to intimidate her?

“You heard me, what did you do to Jiwoo? She skipped classes today and she only does that for very specific reasons. I know you’re involved, so spill it.” Yeojin was very angry. But the anger was trying to disguise her fear and worries regarding her friend. Yeojin haven’t talked to Jiwoo for more than 24 hours and the girl was nowhere to be found. 

“Look Yeojin, I understand that you’re worried about her. I am too. She skipped classes today and she didn’t even cancel our breakfast together. And that’s unlike her, I know it. She doesn’t pick up her phone or text back. But I’m just as clueless as you are.” 

Yves actually went to the gardens to have some time alone, to try and  _ think _ . Think about what could have happened. Think about where could Jiwoo be. The other girls were just as lost as she was. She had even decided to go and look for Yeojin later, as she is Jiwoo’s best friend so she might know where she was, but the girl found her first. And now she’s blaming her for Jiwoo’s disappearance? They last talked the day before, in the morning. And Yves was sure things were fine between them. Even though that coming to think of it, it was indeed a bit peculiar not seeing her in the afternoon. They might not talk a lot at school, but she can’t recall another time when Jiwoo just disappeared like that.

A little calmer now, Yeojin asked: “Do you seriously have no idea where she could be? Did nothing different happened yesterday? I was so sure she was fine now, she had been so euphoric lately..”

Suddenly, Yeojin’s phone started to ring. Both she and Yves froze after hearing the ringtone, wishing strongly that it was Jiwoo. 

Yeojin then took the device out of her pocket and sighed in relief once she saw the picture of their lost friend who was calling, followed by a little name on the screen  _ “Weirdwoo”.  _ The younger girl hurried to accept the call and soon put it on speaker, so both of them could hear their friend.

But the first thing Jiwoo said was not what they would expect at all: “Don’t fight Yves, you dumbass. Stay away from her.”

“...Jiwoo? I swear to God that if you’re disguised at school again I’m gonna…”

“I’m at home. You were planning on freaking out on Yves, weren’t you? Don’t lie.”

Yeojin and Yves exchanged a look. The oldest girl nodded, as giving her permission to answer.

“Maybe.”

Jiwoo sighed over the phone. “So I guess I was right. Unfortunately I know you too well. Don’t involve her. I’m fucking serious. Don--”

“It’s too late for that, Chuu.” Yves interrupted. “Are you okay? What happened? Did I do something wrong?”

“Shit, shit, shit.” Jiwoo was saying over the phone, probably forgetting Yves and Yeojin could hear her. “I’m sorry for not leaving a message to cancel our breakfast, Yves. I sincerely apologize, from the bottom of my heart. I needed some time away from everything and everyone. I didn’t even turn on my cellphone until a few minutes ago.”

“Wow, something must really be wrong with you. I always thought you were glued to this little thing. You’re a fighter, Chuu.”

“Ha-ha. Very funny. I’m not addicted to my phone, I must say that I functioned very well without it for the past hours, thank you very much.” Jiwoo played along.

“We’re very worried about you, Chuu. Yeojin was out of her mind.” Yves told the girl, in a serious tone.

“You’re not alone, you stupidhead. We are your friends and we’re here to help you.” Yeojin completed.

“I’m sorry for making you guys worry. It wasn’t my intention. It’s just… I’m sorry, not even I know why I behave this way.” Jiwoo seemed very hopeless and lost on the phone, which only made Yves want to hug her or wrap the girl in a fluffy blanket, and tell her everything is going to be okay. She’s not alone. She wants to help her, in anyway she can. 

But the next thing Jiwoo said completely broke her: “And Yves…. Please,  _ please _ , don’t take it personally.. I’m really sorry, but can I talk to Yeojin alone for a bit? Not on speaker?”

Yves didn’t know how to react. Perhaps she really  _ did _ something wrong. No.. Not perhaps.. She  _ surely _ did something wrong. 

Yeojin then looked at her full of confusion, like Jiwoo was an alien and she could not understand her language. Yves whispered an “it’s okay” and handed her the phone, feeling defeated. Yeojin couldn’t stop staring at her, with big, emotional, sorry and confused eyes. Yves hated that. She didn’t want anyone’s pity.

She nodded her head and turned around to leave, not in the mood for a proper goodbye. It was just a matter of time until Yves ruined her relationship with Jiwoo. Of course. 

Selfish girls like her are only born to hurt others and spoil every good thing they have.

 

☆☆☆

 

Two days of dead silence from Jiwoo passed and it was already the weekend. 

Saturday went by eventless, with Yves feeling sorry for herself alone in her apartment, marathoning Haikyuu while eating too much ice cream. Which is a self destructive behaviour, as this is one of Jiwoo’s favorite animes and they had made a promise to eat chocolate ice cream together someday after school.  

Ughhhh. Stupid feelings. Yves just want to forget all of them. Let them go. She hurted Jiwoo somehow, so she’s not worthy of the girl. She never had a problem with forgetting people before, but why is this time so different?

Sunday arrived and Yves had planned to continue her pitiful behaviour from the day before and start watching Haikyuu’s second season, while getting drunk on a giant strawberry cake. It was a nice plan. 

But things can’t always happen as you like them to.

Somehow she ended on Jinsol’s house, after a desperate call from her friend begging her to help her on an assignment due the next day. And Yves complied, how could she not? She may be a selfish fool but she won’t allow her friend to fail on her classes. Besides… She’s tired of feeling sorry for herself. Even though she deserves to feel bad, she would like to do something different. So she took the strawberry cake to Jinsol’s house and left Haikyuu for later.

Jinsol sensed something wasn’t quite right with her, but she didn’t try and make Yves talk about it. Which Yves doesn’t know if she was grateful for or not. Somehow she wanted to tell her everything, to open up her heart and ask her “ _ What did I do wrong?” _ . But her friend didn’t want to intrude her privacy, and instead Jinsol just distracted Yves from her frustrated thought, while receiving help for her assignment. 

A few words and many pieces of cake later, they were halfway done.

Which was amazing, considering Jinsol couldn’t stop texting every 5 minutes.

“Seriously, did you only call me so I would do all the work alone? I even gave you free cake, your cellphone can’t be more important than me!” Yves whined.

“Hey hey, I’m sorry! It’s just that my neighbour is asking me a favor, she needs someone to take care of her dog while she’s on vacation with her family. So we’re making the arrangements. Just a second.” She then kept texting her neighbour, neglecting Yves. 

Yves then decided to stand up and take a look around her friend’s room. 

She would never have guessed that Jinsol would be a dog person and accept to look after someone else’s dog. She has a big, adorned fish bowl on her room, where she raises a beautiful betta fish, like it’s royalty. At least her neighbour doesn’t have a cat, though, Yves thought. That could complicate some things.

As if she was being called, Yves then turned her head and looked at the window. Jinsol’s parents had a big house, with an even bigger garden. And when she glanced at it, she was surprised with the view of a big, german shepherd black dog running around freely around the space. That dog was so big that he resembled a wolf, and that scared Yves a little bit.

“Oh! They arrived!” Jinsol exclaimed, after she heard the bell ring. Her mother must had opened the front door to her friend, so Jinsol just got up to meet her neighbour at her bedroom’s door.

“Hello! Thank you so much for taking care of Lupin, you’re an angel, Sol, seriously.” Her neighbour greeted her, as soon as Jinsol opened the door for her.

Yves then froze on her place. She knew that voice very well.

Petrified, Yves then managed to slowly turn around, in order to face her friend’s friend. And her suspicious, unfortunately, were right. 

“....Sooyoung?” The person said, once Yves had turned around and showed her face.

“Wait.. Do you guys know each other?” Jinsol asked, looking at both of the girls with a confused expression. None of them knew what to say, so an awkward silence grew in the room.

After a while, Hyejoo finally broke the silence and answered the question, sensing that Yves planned to stay silent: “Yeah.. From a long time ago.” 

She started to stare at Yves with a cold expression, not letting much of what she might be feeling get out. Her bitter glance gave Yves chills. 

She was feeling very uncomfortable, and part of her just wanted to shake the other girl and demand some explanations about what happened between them a few years ago. And the other part, a mostly hidden and weak one, wanted badly to open her heart and cry out a bunch of apologies. But she refuses to give this impulse a thought, though. It’s not important.  _ It shouldn’t be. _ Yves is not the type of person to get so low. She needs to leave her past behind, just like she did with her old self. She’s supposed to be someone  _ new  _ now. 

Things couldn’t get any worse in Yves life. This definitely wasn’t her week.

 

☆☆☆

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!
> 
> Do you guys hate me? Oops.. Sorry not sorry!
> 
> What did you think of it? Did you like it? 
> 
> I'm so so so happy lately with all of the events of LOONA! Finally our ot12 together and yyxy debuting, it's fantastic! I tried to write Chuuves as soft as possible, I love them so much ;; please tell me your thoughts!
> 
> ps: could you guess what was the little special detail on this chapter?~~~ spoiler: I mentioned all of our 12 beautiful girls in it!!!! It's magical to finally be able to do that! aaaa! <3
> 
> anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed it! The next chapter is already halfway written, so it wont be long until I post it, I just have to finish my final project for college and then I'm free to write <3 and if you want to talk to me or see me crying daily about loona and bts, you can always follow me on [twitter](https://www.twitter.com/JiniusLab)!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading this fic my angels, I hope you all have some wonderful and magical days ahead! <3


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